Psychosis...VERY IMPORTANT PLEASE READ!

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erin.K
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Date Joined Mar 2005
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   Posted 5/7/2008 8:06 PM (GMT -7)   
oh boy...hi guys.  i'm just home from the hospital; went in last week (i forget what day) i think thursday? but i was discharged last night (i had 5 or 6 days in the hospital).
there was some problems with the gallbladder. a lot of inflammation of the small bowel.
 
but something very serious hapenned & i wanted to share it because it's something that should be addressed here.
 
monday & tuesday i suffered a severe psychosis! it was the most terrifying experience i had in my life.
it started with not knowing what day it was, then i didn't know what i was doing (i'd do something like make a phone call and then 1/2 hour later not know i had)
 
monday i lay down & i start to hear voices. and it's the nurses station that i hear.
then i hear a whole bunch of comments being made about me, nasty insults...etc...
things got worse & worse & the paranoia was ridiculous!
so for 2 night i suffered severe audio paranoid hallucinations.
 
i got fresh at the staff there, i yelled at them.
 
i was convinced that they were going to kill me.
 
oh my God!!!!!!!!!! it was torture, i thought i really was going to die.
 
JZ saw me, a psychiatrist saw me too.
i had developed a massive hospital psychosis. and this was brought on by the high dose IV steroids.
aka Steroid Psychosis.  people in ICU also develope ICU Psychosis.
 
aaaaaaaah maaaaaaaaaaaan!!!!!!!!!!!!
people! it was horrendous.
 
tongue  i feel MUCH BETTER NOW!!!!!!!  but hey had to get me outa' there ASAP. so yeah erin really snapped the teather folks! lol.
i feel soooo embarrased about it; i still can't calm down but this helps...writing about it.
 
the head shrink said he sees this in about 95% of all people in the ICU & 95% of all people on the IV steroids that i was.
glad to be home...the gallbladder problem feels a little better. on liquids only for a while.
ok peeps...just wanted to let ya's know what went down.
 
luv & hugs
erin
 
Arthritis Forum Moderator & Co-Pilot
Active Severe Rheumatory Arthritis. Crohns Disease. A.Chiari Malformation.
Meds: Remicade 600mg Q3weeks; 6MP; Prednisone; Entocort; Tigan; LidoDerm; Dilaudid; Oxycodone. 


yalinda
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Date Joined May 2006
Total Posts : 1179
   Posted 5/8/2008 4:42 AM (GMT -7)   
erin my love, you poor women.  what else could possibly happen to sweet erin! 
 
ok what about that dang gallbladder why is it still in you?!  are they working on sceduling surgery to remove it! get it out!!!!!!! both my dad and a good friend died from gallstones making them septic get them the frig out of there!!!!!!!!!!!  i am sorry for sounding so agressive toots but if one gets in the bile duck and shuts you down with sepsis you know the rest of the story not good.  i am very concerned as you dont seem to be mentioning removal??????? i know you have had a lot on your plate but as soon as you have your wits about you please advocate to get it removed.  i care and am very concerned about your well being and docs jerking you around.  so forgive my burst of caring but this upsets me greatly . 
 
on the lighter side i only tend to rant and carry on about gallbladders and politics lol  ....... hugs girlfriend and keep me posted.  lumi yally

babyplace
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 499
   Posted 5/8/2008 5:20 AM (GMT -7)   

Oh Erin,

Can you feel the love and hugs coming from Florida???  As much as I can send is heading your way....I cannot even imagine what you've been through!!  Like Yally said, what on earth can happen to you next?  It is killing me not to be able to do something to help you...please know that we all love you and have you in our thoughts and prayers...

I'm with Yally...lets get that gallbladder out of there!!!  I know you love JZ, what on earth is he saying about all of this???  Please keep us posted...we've all been so worried about you.

Hugs upon hugs,

Jody


momto3
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Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 1331
   Posted 5/8/2008 6:39 AM (GMT -7)   
Erin,
That sounds terrifying!! I have never heard of such a thing!! I'm glad you are home and doing better..as for the gall bladder, are you going to have it out like Yally is asking about, is it going to improve? what was causing the inflammation? I'm with Yally on this one! Bless your heart you have had quite a time lately.

erin.K
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 3148
   Posted 5/9/2008 10:15 AM (GMT -7)   
hey now...signing in from the "CooKoo's Nest" here, tongue , LOL...nah just kiddin'.
hah, my poor Joe! poor guy having to hear all my crap!  but he's been sooooo good about it all & very understanding.  he's starting to tease me about it which is good because it makes me feel better to start to laugh about it.
 
has anyone ever seen "Exorcism of Emily Rose"?...well, that's a pretty darn good picture of what went on! i was hearing all sorts of crap & flippin' out & i can't even remember what things were flying out of my mouth.
 
i think you all should look this up when you get time; last night i read a fantastic report on exactly what happened to me. all i googled was "Steroid Psychosis" and you'd be shocked by the prevelance of it.
 
anywhoo...the gallbladder crap:  i had a Hyda Scan, a CT w/ contrast and an ultrasound. (i couldn't tolerate the barium follow through due to the barfing).
the scans for the gallbladder were so interfered withby inflammation that almost everything was a bit "inconlusive".  the gallbladder was definitely functioning which JZ said was great; but....there was something about the passageway between one thing & another? inflammation mostly, and also something called gallbladder "Sludge"? i have to take a pill called USVR?  mmmm? i'll check later what the bottle says, but it's just an enzyme or something to heelp clear out the gallbladder ducts?  i never heard of it before.
 
an excacerbation of the Crohns disease "could have" been the problem too; because there was a heightened area of inflammation in the right small bowel (very near where i was having the pains).
 
after 2 days in the hospital the abdomen pain got a little better; the pain got A LOT better but the nausea & vomiting took A LONG time to cease. 
whatever the heck the real issue was...it got better when i had no food or liquid by mouth.  so for now the RX is to do liquids only, REST, SLEEP!!!!!!!, antibiotics, the sludge stuff & see how the next week goes.
 
oy! 
 
i'm having a hard time getting over what went on, i'm sooooooo embarassed!  and it feels like you can't turn your freakin' mind off! 
so Joe took me home last night, i'm with him now...going to stay here AS LONG AS POSSIBLE! lol  The peace and quiet is doing helping tremendously.
 
but seriously, when you all get a chance look up that steroid psychosis...it's really interesting stuff.
 
off to go talk to Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds....just kidding.
luvs ya...miss you guys.
erin
 

erin.K
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 3148
   Posted 5/9/2008 10:17 AM (GMT -7)   
in all....i really don't care what is wrong, i just don't want to throw up anymore!
peace
:)
Arthritis Forum Moderator & Co-Pilot
Active Severe Rheumatory Arthritis. Crohns Disease. A.Chiari Malformation.
Meds: Remicade 600mg Q3weeks; 6MP; Prednisone; Entocort; Tigan; LidoDerm; Dilaudid; Oxycodone. 


momto3
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 1331
   Posted 5/9/2008 10:48 AM (GMT -7)   
Erin..
 
I'm glad to hear you are feeling a bit better? and it sounds like they really checked your gall bladder out, and I didn't realize you also have the Chrohns so that probably had something to do with it all?  Last night I had that same pain under my right rib cage but it only lasted for about 20 mintues and then it was gone.  For you, you probably aren't a good candidate for gall bladder surgery right now anyway unless it would be an emergency right? You have been through so much lately.
 
I know you are embarrassed but I'm sure the staff didn't think anything of your outbursts, and Joe seems to be very loving and understanding..it is still frightening to think about I know! How much of the steroids were you taking? was it prednisone?
 
Just get some rest and take your meds, we are all thinking about you.

erin.K
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 3148
   Posted 5/9/2008 8:42 PM (GMT -7)   
sad  yeah HELLO! what a freak do i feel! the whole thing is so unfathomable that i still can not even begin to grasp any of it! oh God i do still feel so embarrased & so ashamed for screaming @ the nurses & causing basically the whole entire hospital to come up to that floor i was on.  humiliating.
you're right momto3....if i saw a patient go through that i would not think any the less of her or him.
 
even like today & even now...it's terribly hard to try to "shut the brain off" and try to relax.
 
but the more i do talk about it the easier it does get.
 
umh yes i was taking 40mg Prednisone starting again 2 wednesdays ago; then i was on 20mg of Pred up until Thursday (May 1st?) where then in the ER  i was given an IV push med of Solumedrol (i forget the dose)....then Friday nite again at the ER i got a IV steroid...THEN they hung a 120mg IV bag of Solumedrol every day up until Monday afternoon.  along with that i received each day an IV push med of steroids.
also was hung: Flagyl, Avelox, Zolfran, Nexium, electrolytes of course & fluids plus i was on PPN (tube feeding)
the dilaudid i got through injections for pain.
 
my aunt who is an RN thought that perhaps the combo of something was making me whacky.
 
the psychiatrist who visited me was awesome. he looked at me like "Relax! You're not NUTS!" he says he sees this all the time.  I HAD NO IDEA this could happen!
 
yally & mom...so this medicine i'm on Actogell (URSOFORTE)...it clears up gallstones or shrinks them or something. to get back to yally & jody's concern about the gallbladder still being in me.
believe me...if JayZ thought it had to get out...it'd be OUT before you could blink. they were prepping me for surgery, but it turned out it didn't need to be done RIGHT THEN.  they still needed more films done.
although i'm very immunecompromised, i could have the surgery if it needed to be done.
 
in all there were quite a few different trouble spots in the GI system going on.  the gallbladder still needs to be watched, but for right now i'm OK with it.
 
nighty night
erin 

Post Edited (erin.K) : 5/9/2008 10:32:22 PM (GMT-6)


erin.K
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 3148
   Posted 5/9/2008 9:22 PM (GMT -7)   
tongue  so for your entertainment...here's the audio hallucinations from my psychosis: (i doubt most will ever get to hear crap like this in their lives.)
{all these voices i swore i heard come from the staff at the nurses station}
 
"I'm a B**CH, snot, brat...."
"I have a brother who's a dentist" ??????????? eyes (wtf?)
"I'm from Phoenix!"
"I stole a vial of Morphine Sulphate"
"I stole a vial of Nexium" {of all the things to steal why the heck would i grab nexium?} lol
"I smell"
"I destroyed my room"
"I stole equipment from the unit"
"I use foot signals to communicate to visitors I had"
"I have STDs!!!!!!!"  (and someone used my bathroom & caught them too so now they have sores) [has anyone wet their pants yet? lol]
"I'm a junkie"
"I downed a bottle of zanax when i was in the ER & they saw me do it" [i wish i had...geesh!]
"I filled all of the drawers with clutter & crap"
"They were going to put drugs into my IV bags" (like chemical restraints)
"I was going to be transported to St. Barnabas Psych Hospital"
"The cops were coming too"
"My room smelled foul"
"I used to model"  [thanks...nice compliment]
"I do internet porn!" {and i swore i heard them laughing at it & actually looking at it, sad }
"I'm an elementary school teacher with a masters degree"  {whaaaaat????!!!!}
 
i also heard the voices make fun of and say the most horrible things about the night cleaning man too!!!!!!!!  uh i felt so awful!
 
in between the lovely conversations were noises like extremely LOUD crashes, doors slamming and also like the ceiling was cracking? plus a weird loud sweeping or brush noise.
 
but i was white as a ghost, drenched in sweat, shaking uncontrollably, in & out of consciousness, ramming my head into the wall to make it stop.
spiked a temp too...i was convulsing & shaking so bad you could actually SMELL the MUSCLES burning!
 
yeah...horrific.
 
what's worst is that I REMEMBER all this crap!!!!! confused i wish i didn't!  but hey...if this helps ANYONE out there then i know i went through it for a reason.
 
i just can't grab it...how can an overachiever, do-gooder, Deans' List student, compassionate, aware, caring, intelligent, straight laced person succumb to this?!?!
 
oy, oy, oy!!!!!!
well folks....it's been real, LOL....i'll letcha's know how i'm doing over the weekend.
 
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO ALL!
love & hugs
erin
 
Current Meds: Avelox 400mg, 6MP 75mg, Remicade 600mgQ3weeks, Entocort,  devil NO PREDNISONE!!!! devil Nexium, Dilaudid 4mgQ6hours, Oxycontin 40mgQ12hours, Ondansetron 4mgQ4hours & URSO FORTE 500mgQ12hours.

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 5/9/2008 11:03 PM (GMT -7)   

Erin,

How absolutely scary that was for you and yes I have seen the ICU psychosis and have taken care of patients that have gone through it.  I have not heard of the Steroid Psychosis but I know people on steroids can have lots of problems with feeling jittery and not being able to sleep etc.

Well I am sure glad you survivied and that you are home.  May this never happen to you again and thank you for sharing your experience with all. The nurse see your name as being admitted they may lock the doors...................LOL.

Talking about it is therapeutic and it is also an education for us so keep posting your experience. :-)
Hugs

Kitt


 
Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety ~ Panic 
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
 


sukay
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 1432
   Posted 5/9/2008 11:33 PM (GMT -7)   

Erin,

Welcome to Home Sweet Home!!!

That had to be a terrible experience. Skitt is right, talking about it is therapeutic and it is also an education for us. In fact I just learned something new from reading about your experience.

The first time I was hospitalized for a partial obstruction, I too was given steriods through the I.V. I had been on steriods for years off and on and know it is an evil drug, but when I had it fed to me through the I.V. at the hospital, I now believe that I too suffered from steriod psychosis!

The nurse came in my room and walked up to my bed and said, "I'm sorry I didn't come sooner, but I got really busy". Then she started to inject something in my I.V. and I asked, "What is that?" She said, "You asked for something for pain." I said,"No I didn't" and she said, "Yes, you did" then I told her "I'm sorry, I have no recollection of that. I'm not in any pain." She said it was ok and then left the room.

A few minutes later she came back in my room and I was now sitting in my chair. She came up again and was trying to put something in my I.V. again! I asked her, "what are you giving me?" She said, "You called and said you wanted something for your pain." Again I told her that I had no memory what so ever of calling her and that I felt so terrible about not remembering any of this. She said, "That's okay" and left.

about 15 min later, my husband came to visit me. I was standing in the middle of the room talking with him and AGAIN the nurse comes in and starts walking towards me. I said, "OH NO! NOT AGAIN?!" And she said, "Yes you did" I explained to my husband what has been happening and the nurse verified everything to him and I told both of them I ABSOLUTELY HAVE NO MEMORY of constantly calling her for pain meds and that I was in no pain what so ever! She just laughed and said not to worry, that it was no problem.

She never explained this to me, maybe she had never heard of it either. I mentioned it to my GI and he didn't seem concerned either.

I also have Bi-polar and was off of all my psych meds. So maybe it was a combination of the two. But I totally understand where you are coming from. Thank goodness I didn't have it to the degree that you did, but I can relate in a way.

Thanks for sharing.


~sukay~
 Bipolar - August 2004
     Crohns disease - 1995 
Arthritis & Fibromyalgia 
 
Leo Buscaglia


erin.K
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 3148
   Posted 5/10/2008 6:35 PM (GMT -7)   
RIGHT?!?!?!?!?!? Ya think you're frickin' NUTS!!!!!!!!!! LOL...the memory crap! I'd make a phone call, then time would pass & I had know idea that I had made the phone call! Not knowing what day it was even though I'd look it up time after time....ugh!
Yeah it was wicked.
Especially when I guess one is so used to "being in control" of your own thoughts & feelings & altogether "with it"...it is soooo disturbing to have this happen.
I dunno...I give a great big hug to anyone who's suffered this & and great big old "It's OK!"
Thank you kitt & sukay very much.
Take good care
erin
Arthritis Forum Moderator & Co-Pilot
Active Severe Rheumatory Arthritis. Crohns Disease. A.Chiari Malformation.
Meds: Remicade 600mg Q3weeks; 6MP; Prednisone; Entocort; Tigan; LidoDerm; Dilaudid; Oxycodone. 


babyplace
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 499
   Posted 5/10/2008 8:26 PM (GMT -7)   
Erin dear Erin,
Just got some time to respond to your post...you poor thing!  What an absolute nightmare you have been through....gosh never, no never will I touch a steroid!!!
I wish there was some way you could stop re-living the memories of all of this...I pray that will come with time.  Please, please don't feel so bad about yourself or embarassed, it was not you, it was the drugs, keep reminding yourself of that.  Pretty sure those nurses have seen and heard worse.  Very scary to me that the same meds they gave to you HELP you, ended up doing this to you instead.
Are those meds completely out of your system now?  Just wondering if that is part of the reason you are having trouble relaxing, on top of everything else, are there residual effects that have to wear off?  Maybe a dumb question...just a thought though.
Hey..we're sludge buddies lol!!  I had the hida scan and all that done, and that's what they found in mine "sludge".  Sounds wonderful, huh?  But, my gallbaldder function was only a 5 when it should have been around 35 if I remember right.  So, anyway, out it came.  I'm just so glad that they are watching everything so closely for you..Im sure JayZ will take good care of you.  Especially after all of this!!
Well, gotta hit the hay,  hugs to you dear..hope you are feeling better each day.
Jody
 

erin.K
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 3148
   Posted 5/11/2008 6:25 PM (GMT -7)   
hi jody,
oh no, no, no!!!!  the last thing i want coming out of this is people avoiding their prescribed steroids!!!  believe me, i had some INTENSE factors going on & in an extremely fragile state.
the psychiatrist explained that Steroid Psychosis is specific to IV therapy steroids & being isolated as an inpatient; normal prednisone use by mouth & tapering down as prescribed by your Dr. won't cause the psychotic episode like i experienced (severe paranoid delusions & hallucinations).
 
i had A LOT working on me jodysolumedrol IV injections PLUS an IV bag of steroids infusing [i don't remember the doses or frequency of the meds] ; flagyl & avelox pumpin'; 2 nausea & vomit meds; i hadn't eaten 5 days; 6 days with ZERO sleep; dilaudid injections every 3 hours; & i'd lost a LOT of weight...
 
the conditions were PRIME for a total meltdown! when i say fragile, I WAS FRAGILE.
 
prednisone is vital for acute inflammation, it's crucial for autoimmne diseases...so anyone taking it under the doctors care shouldn't be afraid of this happening.
he said it's specific to IV use mainly.
 
i don't know how long it takes to get the steroids out of the system...but i know i'm not "in the clear" yet, BUT I AM GETTING THERE! :-)
i do feel steroid withdrawel however...similar to when i try to taper off pred.  hands are still trembling, i'm SUPER vigilant, anxious, and am not at rest when i try to go to sleep.
kinda' like you can't shut your mind off enough to relax?
hah! you've got the SLUDGE too! tongue now i have a buddy along with yally to talk gallbladders with.
 
well my dear peeps...i'm still with my hunny, heading off to bed now.  i'm going to stay here up in the mountains until Wednesday...i think i'm way too edgy yet to be in the city right now.  the peace up here is soothing & i do feel BETTER where i am here.
 
peace/love
erin
Arthritis Forum Moderator & Co-Pilot
Active Severe Rheumatory Arthritis. Crohns Disease. A.Chiari Malformation.
Meds: Remicade 600mg Q3weeks; 6MP; Avelox; Zolfran; Entocort; URSO Forte; Dilaudid; Oxycodone. 


yalinda
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2006
Total Posts : 1179
   Posted 5/11/2008 11:57 PM (GMT -7)   
hey chickie!  sounds like a day back in the sixties! lol  sorry i know it was terrifying and all but who couldnt love erin even through psychosis?
 
just make certain that gallbaldder will be fine.  also with all the med stuff i forget ..... did you go to a pain management guy? is that covered with your insurance?
maybe a look at all the combos you have been on over the past year might help prevent any future episodes? 
 
my MIL went through simular situation only heres were visual too!  funny thing is she saw a deer in her hospital room and thought it was so cute and wanted to pet it and then that next morning the news said a deer had broken through the glass enterence of that same hospital the previous night!  no joke!  and she saw all these faces too so i wondered hmmmmmm?  was the cute deer a ghost??? hmmmmm crazy but uncanny too?!   she never made any connection so why should i? 
 
well i hope you are all better and glad to see tons of postings.  hang in there toots we love ya!  yals

erin.K
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 3148
   Posted 5/12/2008 6:54 AM (GMT -7)   
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS YALLY}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} you're the best...uh yeah uh huh i rose the spirit of Timothy Leary! LOL...i would NOT do well on LSD!  i told this to Joe a few years ago when we were talking about mushrooms & lsd, psychedelics & all that crap; i'd NEVER because i hate my brain being screwed with.
 
i did had slight visual hallucinations, but no wildlife in the room tongue ...the nurses name tags they wear around their neck?...her name tag I SWEAR changed each time she came in. that & what looked like shadows move around the room.  but mostly all was Audio.
 
tee hee  hee...i'm a good mental patient. tongue
 
YES!!!!!!!! i have a fantastic pain management doc!  :-) small little dude!  i see him @ a hospital once a month; he tweaked the dilaudid & oxycontin to a dose that's FINALLY effective.
 
so yeah no sleep yet, bummer. joints hurt bad today, it's damp & cold out today.
snuggling with JuneBug & Stella (my 2 new kittens @joe's) with some movies today.
 
peace/love
erin
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