not that this will make it much better, but perhaps your father simply isn't capable of dealing with your illness, or his mother's illness for that matter. I know people like this; the easiest way for them to deal with it is NOT to deal with it. They come across to others as very callous and discompassionate, and yes, downright selfish. My father was like this somewhat when my mother was so ill. She had mixed connective tissue disease that had her struggling through ICUs my entire life. My father had a very difficult time dealing with it, so he didn't. He simply pretended that everything was normal and that she could and should do everything that she always did. Was it selfish? Yes! I'm sure that it hurt my mother terribly at times. I believe they both worked it all out before she passed away, but jeez, he sure didn't make it very easy for her.
I feel so fortunate and blessed that I have such a supportive and understanding husband. It sounds like your boyfriend is also very encouraging and supportive. Always try to surround yourself with supportive types. With everything on your plate, you've got quite a heavy load.
yeah, you're all right. i don't know...if i were him, i'de be kissing MY butt! i mean, he's getting older...who does he think is going to take care of him? and he's a nurse as a daugher? i don't understand. so yeah, he'll be one lonely person.
my boyfriend thinks i should have stopped speaking to him a few months ago whe he pulled another stunt that left me in tears for 3 days.
you know...i always had so much pride and was a go-go-go person, an overachiever, and bad enough i feel like a failure most of the time because "this" i can't make go away & can't take care of myself....to have a self-absorbed selfish ba**ard say something like that...
he'll get his. and it's not my nature to say something like that, but my life is all about trying to please and help and matter to other people & hopefully make someone's life better...and a person like that should never have to hear this.
he probably doesn't want to give my mother alimoney anymore, or something. i mean, he gives me nothing so i don't know why he's doing this to me.
he's a bad person. manipulative and just really makes you feel terrible.
oh man, hah!...if i were a kid....oh we used to really get em', my friends and i....when we were like 12. he'd do something like come home drunk & go after me or my mother or wreck something....at night my friends would come and take a leak and a pooh in his gas tank! and on the windshield too! and it would freeze! it was so gross..but deserving. oh those were the days! hah!....maybe me & my honey will go pull some pranks this weekend. get some toilet paper and eggs! ah geez...thanks guys. for everything.
First off Erin - HAPPY beleated BIRTHDAY!!!!
With the exception of the horrible phone call - I hope the rest of your birthday was a wonderful celebration!
Unfortunately, there are people out there who if they haven't been there they just can't understand or fathom what you are talking about. On top of it, I think elcamino hit the button on the nose - he can't deal to boot. He sweeps it under the rug and just doesn't think or try to realize how sick you are!
I agree with Susie - go in and SHOW him how sick you are.... though, he's such a jerk, it may backfire, but I was thinking the same thing she was...though, if he offers again - tell him you'd like an office in the throne room and you'll think about coming in for pay to sit on the can for 6 hours 3 days a week. It'll help pay for all your preperation H cream.
Anyway, I'm so sorry he ruined your birthday...I'd have yelled at him. Heck, I yelled at my mom the other day when I got fed up with her. Whoops.
Ducky! Egging Erin on like that!
I have such a hard time believing a father can be that heartless and uncaring to his own child, yet I know they are out there. It saddens and angers me to no end.
Erin, you are better without. I'm so sorry to say that about one's father, but it's true. He refuses to open his ears and heart to your pleas. Just walk away and wash your hands of him. You owe him nothing. If he wants to try and make contact - that's your call to let him, but you are allowed to stick up for yourself and command his attention with the facts. If he refuses to listen, you can hang up or at least tell him to stop even "trying" since he refuses to give you any support (emotional, financial, parental) whatsoever! ErrrgggghhhhhH!
that's right. i am feeling better mentally/emotionally now that i have spoken up for myself & took a stand.
it's a hard thing to do. because as an adult...i keep thinking, "well i don't know what he's going through or whatever"....but this is and i finally realized complete verbal abuse and only makes any stress triggerred symtpoms worse. and being as bad a condition i am...i do my best every day to make myself stay happy, positive, and optimistic. and to have someone constantly insult you and make you feel like sh** is a sin. i have a lot of respect for myself...but unfortunatley a small mouth, and don't give a piece of my mind to him when i should (but this is something that probably goes back 20 years ago already)! but i have better things in my life to worry about...he can go stick a sharp stick up his A**! LOL.
i have strong ripe words for when he calls. i didn't answer the phone today! hah! perhaps i'll change my number. or let Joe pick it up! even better, he'll get all mafioso on em'! pull a Tony Soprano! hah LOL.
oh Ducky i don't know....what's the most expensive hotel in Vegas? ...that's the one he'll be at.
what an ordeal....glad that i have you all to help me through this. and CHEERS to all the good fathers out there doing a GREAT JOB!