Post Edited (missie1227) : 4/14/2006 1:52:31 PM (GMT-6)
How are you doing today? I'm sorry to hear that you're having so much pain. Your last post said that your rheumy wants you to try humira, but you're scared of the side effects. I can tell you that I was scared of the side effects of tnf-inhibitors too, but I took humira for 3 months with nothing, except a bit more bruising than normal. I'm currently taking Enbrel, and I don't even have the bruising with that. The severe side effects from those drugs are pretty rare, but the pharmaceutical companies have to legally list them. The great thing about trying a new drug is that you have the ultimate control over whether you take it or not. I'm always a bit nervous before I take a new drug, but I realize that if I don't like it, I don't need to ever take it again. Please consider trying the humira--it has been a miracle drug for many. I hope you feel better soon.
thanks guys.....i have alot on my plate right now. my ex- m-i-l is dying and my son (21) left college to go to be by her bedside at his uncles's home in NJ. she doesnt want to die in a hospital so they are going to let her pass away in the uncles's home i guess as peacably as they can. she is in end stage cancer and was given only 6 mos to live and that was in dec.
she is fading fast i understand from my son, who is at her bedside ( taking off from college) and frankly i am upset for my son, as when she goes he will no longer have a grand ma anymore. although i didnt get along with her, i always fostered a good rapport for my son to keep up with her and didnt personally hold a grudge against her.
i went to go to see my cousin who i have not seen in more than 25 yrs who was visiting fl from ny a few days ago. we had a nice reunion and were sad to have let so much time go by inbetween us.( family fights from her mom and my mom fostered this separetion)
i did not tolerate the drive very well ( 2 hrs away) and ended up staying in bed all day today from sheer exhaustion also.
i dont understand why i can not do anything anymore and i feel like a very old person inside. something is sapping my strenght and energy i feel, i cant explain it.
i was supposed to have a nuclear bone scan test where they shoot you full of radioactive dye then tell you to drink lots of water, then come back 3 hours later to put you through a machine to measure the bone density afterwards.
i couldnt take the test b/c the place was 40 miles away and i was too tired to drive it from the drive home from yesterday from seeeing my cousin.
i literally slept all day long and could not get out of bed.
i have to re-schedule the test some place closer to home and asked why the person who told me to take the test didnt tell me where it was located or give me a choice to have it done as an out patient basis at a nearby hosptial instead of making me drive 40 miles one way, get an injection, go home drink lots of water then come back to be scanned.
i have 3 hospitals down the road from where i live that i could get to in minutes to have this done. the woman told me b/c i didnt keep my appt she was going to have to charge me for the injection since she ordered it already. i asked her why she didnt tell me where she was located when she called to confirm the appt and give me directions beforehand.
oh well i am done fighting with people. i dont know how much this test is going to tell me anyways....i have already had many xrays which say the same thing dont they?
all i know is that from last year to this year i have notice a decline in my energy and physical health and well being. and i dont understand why. i feel like i am getting ready to see people who i have not seen in a long time to say goodbye to them.
hey missie, me again:
this sounds like a real low point. pretty hard to get through? just know that everything mental and emotional also is equally physical too. should it be needed, please seek someone to speak to, a Dr. who can assist you through a particularly rough patch.
family is draining! driving?....forget it! when i get home on a tuesday morning, i've only been in the car for 1 hour and i swear, the commute sets me off into a flare like mode. is it the sitting? who knows, but it is taxing. even if ya don't do the driving!
wish this didn't need 24 hour a day 365 day a year mantainance, but it does. we constantly are adapting to changes and hardships. some not so easy.
when are you going for the bone scan?
take care missie, and know that you are valued and a good person.