my husband acting weird

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katy_33
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2008
Total Posts : 147
   Posted 2/21/2008 6:20 PM (GMT -7)   
very manipulative and throws tantrums like a 3yr old!!!!
how should i handle him ,i feel so lost.
helpppppppppppp!!!!!!!!
katy
Worry doesn't empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties today of its strength.
- ' Corrie Ten Boom '


serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 2/21/2008 6:26 PM (GMT -7)   
You know what you do with a three year old: make sure she's safe and then walk away and ignore her. If you give into the behavior you're just reinforcing it.

Katy, when are you going to stand up to him?

serafena
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum

Bipolar II
It is a melancholy of mine own, compounded of many simples, extracted from many objects, and indeed the sundry contemplation of my travels, in which my often rumination wraps me in a most humorous sadness. -- William Shakespeare


katy_33
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2008
Total Posts : 147
   Posted 2/21/2008 6:33 PM (GMT -7)   
oh sera when my legs get strong enough!!!!!i am waitin dear
Worry doesn't empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties today of its strength.
- ' Corrie Ten Boom '


serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 2/21/2008 6:39 PM (GMT -7)   
I just think that's what it's going to take. You're not going to be able to "do" anything to "handle" him until you put your foot down about what you won't put up with.
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum

Bipolar II
It is a melancholy of mine own, compounded of many simples, extracted from many objects, and indeed the sundry contemplation of my travels, in which my often rumination wraps me in a most humorous sadness. -- William Shakespeare


Carolsclan
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 38
   Posted 2/21/2008 7:41 PM (GMT -7)   
 
Katy I tend to agree with Serafina here .. stop taking his nonsense.. my hubby doesnt take mine and I love him all the more for it, cos if it wasnt for him I would have lost it long ago.
Owner of parrots, dogs, cats
 
"I got rid of the kids cos the animals were allergic"


loving frustrated wife
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 865
   Posted 2/21/2008 9:29 PM (GMT -7)   
What's going on right now is more about you Katy....the issue at this moment is your lack of commitment to yourself....find THAT and standing up to him will be a piece of cake. LFW

Dasa
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 37
   Posted 2/22/2008 10:13 AM (GMT -7)   

Katy, I agree that you need to walk away during a tantrum.  When he is calm later on then tell him that you can't live with behavior like that and won't.  That's what I did about dh's verbal abuse and he stopped.  I just said, I won't live like that and you need to stop.  Not in a argumentative tone but a tone of this is my decision, it is not a discussion.  And I didn't participate in trying to justify my decision either, it was just my decision. 

BUT.......if your dh is the violent type, don't confront him if you think he will get physically abusive. I knew that mine wouldn't, he might hit a wall but he won't hit me.   If yours is the violent type, go get personal counseling AND find a way to leave him. You might even need to leave him first and then get counseling.

Mine has explosive problems more from Adult Attention Deficit Disorder than he does bipolar.  I have had to learn new ways of communicating with mine because of it.  I don't push him when he starts losing his thoughts and I can see when he does that now.  ADD is often a comorbid disorder that often bipolar folks have in addition to bipolar.   

 

 

 

 

 


katy_33
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2008
Total Posts : 147
   Posted 2/22/2008 2:32 PM (GMT -7)   
Thanks a lot everyone,in this time of sadness ,i need my HW FAMILY and i love you all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HUGS
KATY
Worry doesn't empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties today of its strength.
- ' Corrie Ten Boom '


sukay
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 1432
   Posted 2/23/2008 10:42 PM (GMT -7)   

Hi Katy,

I know what you are going through is difficult. But I believe you need to get the ball started. Have you tried to implement and of the suggestions that were given to you?

Have you ever seen the show "The Nanny"? Wouldn't it be great if she would make house calls for marital problems where spouses don't know how to treat each other in a healthy way? She walks people through the process of making the necessary changes in their life to regain better relationships in their family.

That is basically what we are doing here. I hope you are trying to incorporate our suggestions into your relationship. Good Luck.


katy_33
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2008
Total Posts : 147
   Posted 2/25/2008 8:05 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Sukay,
I am trying still,not feeling too well lately.I haven't watched that show you mentioned,which channel it comes on .Where are you now a days?
hugs
katy
Worry doesn't empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties today of its strength.
- ' Corrie Ten Boom '


serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 2/26/2008 2:10 PM (GMT -7)   
Katy,

Sorry to hear you're under the weather. Hope it's nothing serious.

serafena
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum

Bipolar II
It is a melancholy of mine own, compounded of many simples, extracted from many objects, and indeed the sundry contemplation of my travels, in which my often rumination wraps me in a most humorous sadness. -- William Shakespeare

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