Yana, time to take a look at why you are allowing ANYONE...BP or not, to treat you the ways you are saying he does. To quote you..."he gets violent and abusive...a monster". There is NO circumstance that makes this acceptable. Therefore, unless this man wants help...which clearly he doesn't....why are you still there? The only real service I feel we can be to you is to ask you to take a look at that for yourself, and take action to effect your own life in a positive way. Now...it is certainly your decision to stay in an abusive relationship, and no one can make you leave. But, then you need to recognize YOU are choosing that, which is of course your right, but no one can help you if that is what you choose.
I know my words may seem harsh, but given your description...I think you need to hear a dose of reality. You are not dealing with a person committed to wellness here. A person committed to be a responsible man. And, without those 2 things...this will be your life forever. And it only will get worse over time without HIS choosing to get help. So all that is left is for you to make the healthiest choices you can for YOU. I wish you luck with that and God's speed to value yourself enough to not live that way for yourself. LFW.