when is the right time too.....

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Dailystruggle
New Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 7/12/2008 12:25 PM (GMT -7)   
before i get to my real question ill tell you a little bit about me. 5 years ago i was diagnosed with MDD, anxiety and ADD. i have been on a load of medicines but have started to find the right combination. about 3 weeks ago my doctor told me she believes i am Bipolar, anxiety and ADD. i currently take effexor xr, geodon, buspar, and concerta. she thinks i need lithium too. but my real question is: i have been seeing this guy since november(he lives in a different state) and he knows nothing about any of the meds that i take or my diagnosis. so when and if do i tell him im bipolar? is there ever a good time?

closure
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 471
   Posted 7/12/2008 1:20 PM (GMT -7)   
oh...this is a hard one. honestly I think you passed the best time to tell him...not to make you feel bad. it doesn't mean you still can't tell him though. first I have a couple of questions, how serious are you guys? how did you meet? and how often do you see each other? I'm not trying to be nosy I'm just trying to figure out a good way to tell him. I mean if you guys see each other often or even if you don't, but when you do see each other it's for a few days he might already suspect something is up unless you're really good at hiding your symptoms. do you guys talk alot? do you know how he feels about mental illnesses or even medicine and doctors in general? I gave up dating the old fashioned way and met my current boyfriend of 3 years online. He also lived in a different state. When I first tried online dating I kept my illnesses a secret and if anyone ever came over I would hide my pills, etc. That didn't work out too well. So finally I gave up and on my dating profile online I just came right out and said I was on disability for whatever and if people have a problem with it too bad. I met my current boyfriend and he was very understanding and appreciated that I was upfront about everything. One snag we ran into...he didn't really have a bad attitude about mental illnesses, but he hated doctors and didn't believe in taking medicines long term. That was just a family thing for him...his family never goes to the doctor or takes meds and here I am going to the doctor multiple times a month and taking a boatload of meds. We got past that thankfully. I guess my point is to really try to see how he feels about these things and then decide on how to tell him. He might be hurt that you kept this all from him the whole time so try to be prepared for that. If he's an understanding guy he might be ok with it if you explain that it was hard for you, you didn't know how to do it, etc. If you guys aren't that serious then it probably wouldn't be a problem if it didn't work out, but I'm assuming it must be getting serious if you're considering telling him about this. Keep us updated! I hope it all works out for you.
27 female
 
Bipolar, panic disorder, PTSD, PCOS, hashimoto's disease/hypothyroidism, and in the process of being diagnosed with crohns. Too many meds to list!


closure
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 471
   Posted 7/12/2008 5:13 PM (GMT -7)   
Mommy2ethan...I will add you on MSN messenger, do you use that much? I don't want to get in trouble for going off topic and don't want take over dailystruggle's thread. *hugs*
27 female
 
Bipolar, panic disorder, PTSD, PCOS, hashimoto's disease/hypothyroidism, and in the process of being diagnosed with crohns. Too many meds to list!


serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 7/13/2008 5:53 PM (GMT -7)   
Sorry guys -- you can use the chat room if you're on at the same time!
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum
Bipolar II


serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 7/13/2008 5:57 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Dailystruggle,

Let me welcome you to HealingWell and to our board. We're glad you hear and you've already gotten some fabulous feedback. I hope you find the kind of support you're looking for here. I have to agree with closure and M2E that you need to let your bf know as soon as possible about your condition. You really just found out about it, so it's not really too late. Everyone needs time to process and come to terms with a bipolar diagnosis -- it's a big deal. In fact, if you have questions or need advice, please feel free to let us know. In any case, I wouldn't wait on telling him lest he get the idea you're hiding things from him, which is no way to start a relationship.

Again, welcome and good luck.
serafena
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum
Bipolar II

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