Ok, I have to vent. Sorry guys but this is necessary. I am going crazy, losing my mind!! I took three Ativan yesterday just to make it through. As some of you know, I am 27 weeks and on no activity; bedrest. I can sit in bed, on the couch, on the floor, sit anywhere as long as I don't lift, walk, or basically do anything at all. Well, we took my daughter to the library yesterday for baby read time. There were only 8 babies there with their moms but it was loud!!! And Hot!! I panicked like crazy. Had to get out of there. My daughter wasn't even interested in playing with her friends; she just clung to me and my mom. Then there is this whole can't do anything. I know it is necessary to get my baby here safely but I am going nuts. Exercise use to be my outlet even while pregnant. Now I have no outlet other than this place. My dad is driving me nuts too. He is so self-centered; talks about what other people think of him and how wonderful he is. He has a cold and we hear about how bad he feels. He thinks my daughter is a show-and-tell doll. Has to make her do things for him, perform; "clap your hands" "Give pop-paw a kiss" blah, blah, blah. My dm is here all day to help take care of my daughter and I love her to death for the help but I need some space, always have needed space and down time for me. Especially when I don't feel well, like right now. I cried all day yesterday and some today already. I have taken Ativan but can only take it three times and day and sometimes I need it more. Then there is my dh; he is so good to me but lately he has been getting on my nerves too. He is dying to go to the company picnic in Aug. Well, I am not allowed to be in the heat, I can't do anything but sit around. The picnic is outside; it will be hot, hot, hot. I told him that I just can't go. He should go and take our daughter if he wants. But NO, he can't go without me. He is being selfish right now and he rarely is ever that way. AND his dad, and mom and her boyfriend are coming Aug. 1st for our daughter's first birthday. OK, I can't handle that at all. His dad is staying with us; he talks loud because he can't hear. His mom and her boyfriend (who talks loud also and gets on my nerves) are staying in a hotel. They get here Friday and leave Sunday. I can't cook, clean, nothing. His mom is a non-stop talker. I am going to go insane!!!! I think I already am losing it now. UUUUGGGG!! I am a wreck. I even have the shakes.
Ok, I vented. Any suggestions on how to handle all of this right now? I sure need some. Thanks for listening to me. Please think of me, pray for me if you pray. I need all the support I can get right now. All I do is cry. I feel so overwhelmed and frustrated.
"I'm not crazy; I'm just a little unwell." Matchbox Twenty