Depression sucking me in

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Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 163
   Posted 8/6/2008 4:40 PM (GMT -6)   
Once again today, I am depressed and weeping.  I took another Ativan and it helped me to relax and sleep for two hours this morning.  Then I took another two hour nap this afternoon.  It helps for a while but then I still feel depressed.  I feel like I am missing out on my baby daughter who just turned 1 on Aug. first.  His parents were here from WV and my parents were here too.  I hardly had any time with her then.  Now I am depressed and sleeping most of the day and hardly see her now.  I feel guilty.  And that depresses me more.  I know this will pass; it always does being the combination of pregnancy hormones and low dosages of meds.  Hopefully tomorrow I will be back to normal but then I think what really is normal when you are bipolar.  I am so ready to have this second baby so that I can get back on my full strength of medications but then battle postpartum depression like I did before but only for a little while.  And at least all of the pregnancy complications will be gone and I won't be worried about those too.  I forgot to tell you that I have developed Orthostatic Hypotension from bedrest.  It is where the heart pumps blood to my feet but has trouble pumping it back up to my heart and brain so when I am up and moving around I faint.  I try to do leg movements when I am awake and I try to stand still when I am up.  I try to not jump up from a sitting position and just take off but to take my time.  But still all of this doesn't help, I'll still be walking down the hallway and bam!  I hit the floor.  Well, just something more to worry about.  I just want to scream.
OK, I have whined enough.  Thanks for listening.
Anyone else have lots of complications while pregnant?
"I'm not crazy; I'm just a little unwell."  Matchbox Twenty

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