I usually try to be upbeat on this board, and really try to help those that are in bad situations. My problems are actually quite trivial and I feel guilty listing them here because I may appear insulting to some that have much larger trials than me. But I am struggling right now.
A while back, my wife and I moved to town because I could not keep up our place in the country and it was causing me too much stress. My wife went back to work as a nurse, I started a lawn mowing business. Everything was going great until I began to go into a depression for some reason a month ago. I never had much problems with depressives, manias were my problem. Doc changed my lithium dosage and added ativan, but no real help.
Then a 2 weeks ago I blew a stop sign and t-boned a lady in a civic. Hurt her really bad. Totaled my truck, my trailer came off and flipped, destroying all my yard equipment. I went put of control and ended up in jail again. Police checked my record and saw all the prior arrests I had and judge set my bond at $50,000. We didn't have $500 to bond me out, I went nuts in jail and ended up in the isolation cell. A neighbor loaned us the money to bond out, but I had to spend 2 days in jail.
My wife is trying to hold it all together. But just when things seem to be getting better, this disease rears its ugly head up again and snatches me back down. I am sick of it.
Well, thats it
I want "I wish I had one more day to spend at the office" on my tombstone.
I used to be crazy, but now I have enough money to be called eccentric.