why do I feel the way I feel? Empty when I am full. Sad, mad, scared, and anxious, panic, lost. I feel like everything I do is not getting finished, start something and it does not feel finished. I dwell on the pain, and stair into space wishing it would all go away. Will I stay like this for life? I feel depressed, empty and sad. I took seriqual one hour early so maybe I can sleep through the pain. The past is gone now I just worry about the future, scared to death. I sit here and stair at the words, so hard to explain and what the pain is, but it’s in my heart. It actually hurts. I’m trying to make it through this but why; why is this happening. I can’t sit in the silence, the silence is killing me. Makes me worse. I need a magic pill to fix this I don’t want days like this. Is it depression, bipolar, or plan insanity?