I am thankful that even though I just started medication number 8, 9 or 10, I lost count, that I have not given up. My success lies in the fact that each and everyday I wake up and know that if this med does not work out, i will find the strength somewhere to keep trying. I am much better than I was just a few short years ago but I want even better, and I will get there. Atleast I have come to terms with my illness and I know the abnormal things I have done in the past were because of mania and not that I was a bad person. I have been successful in finding this forum because before I found it, I felt I really had no one to talk to that had any idea what you go thru. I am a lucky person in that I have a husband who is still with me, loves me and lets me know in a flat minute if I am unreasonably out of line and gives me space when I need it and a hug when I need it, two great kids who think I am the best person they know regardless of past failures (I guess in my eyes, not theres) and my in home therapist, my dog. He listenes to me for hours on end and never tells anyone (haha), he licks my tears when I cry, when I am depressed he will come over to me and push his forehead against mine and has taught me that a good nap fixes alot of things. My success is realizing all the good things I have going for me in my life. I just wish it had not taken me so long to appreciate it all, but if that is the worst thing, i am good.