Serafena and Olivia: sorry for not following the rules regarding the introduction of oneself in a new posting.
I am fairly new at this but the posts I have read so far have made me feel not so alone in my experience of living with a husband with bd.
Up until I joined this forum and I had two crying sessions with two different girlfriends, I had NEVER discussed my husband's bd with ANYONE. After this winter break, I decided I needed help for myself and that I am done being silent about bd.
Tonight though, my parents, who have no idea about my husband's "secret" watched our three kids so we could go out to catch a movie. I didn't know if we would go through with it since my husband usually changes his mind about going out with me at the last minute.
Tonight I asked him how he was feeling and whether he went back to taking his meds every day as opposed to every other day. He said he is
. He also told me that when he's on the meds he feels numb and that that is why he stops taking them every day. I very nicely told him that he needs to take them every day and that if he wanted me to go with him to see the doctor, I would go with him. He said what for!!! Ugh. Obviously they need to be adjusted!!! He said he's tried every thing there is to try and nothing has worked. Is the numbing feeling common among others of you with bd? I also very nicely told him that therapy with the meds would be a good idea. Got no comment on that one...
I also told him that I joined a support group (you all) and he was actually curious to know what you all had to say. I shared with him that what he and I are going through is common among couples where one spouse is bd. I also told him I was going to get counseling next week. I wasn't ready to ask him to come with me. I also reminded him that when we got married I promised to be with him in sickness and in health etc and then i lost it and started tearing up so I stopped there.
Tonight I felt hopeful.
I am a 34 year old woman married to a bipolar man. 2009 will be 10 year anniversary. Three small children. Seeking therapy for myself- finally. Desperately want to keep my family together and save my marriage. Husband doesn't want to go to marriage counseling. Looking for support from other people with bipolar spouses. Thanks.