Bipolar? Or am I losing it?

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KriStyn
New Member


Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 1/9/2009 9:21 AM (GMT -7)   
Hello!
I'm seeking advice and or help from anyone that might be dealing with similar episodes as me.

My whole life I've always been really high(emotionally) or really low, with a happy medium in between. But for the last month or so I am up, down, up, down and have uncontrollable fits of rage- where I end up screaming, cursing, throwing things, or plopping myself angrily and dramatically on the couch or bed (where I then sit and scowl trying to calm myself down.)

Now I have a 1 year old baby girl that is wanting to test mommy's tolerance all day. Which I am usually understanding and passive at her attempts to get her way. She is just a baby!
But for some reason she isn't safe from my short fuse either. My episodes aren't so severe with her but I still catch myself huffing and puffing and growling under my breath or even throwing my hands up shaking my head and walking out the room.

But when it comes to my freak outs around my husband... Uh oh. I will scream, throw, storm off, curse, grunt, stomp, roll my eyes, ect...
He does all he can to help me, ease my tension, fix what set me off to begin with ect.. But I still flip out and get stuck in this foul mood.
Where I'm stuck in this dark part of myself and nothing gets me out. Even if the reason I got angry has been resolved and life should be perfect again... I can't shake the anger I explode randomly.

Anyone know what might be going on with me? I need to fix this before I explode!!! confused confused confused

serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 1/9/2009 9:35 AM (GMT -7)   
KriStyn,

Hello and welcome to HealingWell.

You know, having a 1 year old is REALLY hard, so your first step is to give yourself a break. You probably need some time out, a break from being Mommy all the time, and that would help some. You sound exhausted.

But, the mood swings are getting you down, and to that end, I would definitely recommend seeing a doctor -- preferably a psychiatrist -- about them. You may have depression, you may have bipolar, you may have something else altogether, but a doc will be able to see what's going on and give you a treatment plan to try and alleviate some of your tension.

A third thing to try is some counseling or a therapist. If money is tight, check if your town has a mental health clinic. If they do, they probably offer services on a sliding scale. You would probably feel better if you had someone to talk to who was entirely your own advocate, who listened only to you and who had no one but your own interests at heart. It feels good to get your stresses off your chest and to be assured that you're not crazy.

And you're clearly not -- just stressed out to the max. Keep writing. It's good to vent here and we'll be supportive and friendly. Promise.

serafena
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum
Bipolar II

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