How to help a friend?

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worriedfriend
New Member


Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 1/15/2009 6:03 PM (GMT -7)   
 

Post Edited (worriedfriend) : 1/19/2009 1:12:38 PM (GMT-7)


serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 1/15/2009 7:32 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Worriedfriend,

Welcome to HealingWell and to the bipolar board. Obviously I'm no doctor, so I can't say for sure. Your friend does certainly show symptoms of bipolar, but she also sounds a little borderline personality disorder too. I'm sorry for you. I would be hurt too.

The unreliable friendships is something you get with bipolar sometimes. People are unreliable when their moods start swinging, but the way she just cuts you out sounds more borderline to me. Do you think any good would come of telling her your concerned and asking her to get an evaluation? Are you on good enough terms with the husband that you could talk to him about it or would she feel too betrayed?

This is a toughie...

Good luck,
serafena
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum
Bipolar II


worriedfriend
New Member


Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 1/15/2009 8:09 PM (GMT -7)   
Thanks for the quick reply. I think she would most definately cut me off totally if I told her she needed to be evaluated. She keeps saying its her thyroid when I question her. She is on thyroid meds...the lowest dosage.. I did some research online and it said that thyroid and bipolar can go hand in hand. Have you heard of this?
http://www.psycheducation.org/thyroid/introduction.htm

I don't know her husband that well because we don't socialize(the 4 of us I mean)...not for lack of trying on my part..she always comes up with excuses not to get together. He is a nice guy...but I don't know what he thinks of her behaviour...I would think with her family history he would have suspicions that she may have something other than a thyroid prob. She is 35. I will read up on borderline as well. Its just with the manic way she has been acting..with the whole "flight of ideas" and being super creative...she wrote an entire play in a night..it was a short play...but really it was crazy!

thanks so much!

If anyone else that suffers from this has some ideas for me on "how to" or "NOT to" approach someone..please let me know!
R.

serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 1/15/2009 8:32 PM (GMT -7)   
Yes, I've heard of the thyroid/bipolar connection before -- I have hypothyroidism myself. The thyroid problems mimic depression, so often times people who are depressed will be treated as such and make no progress in their treatment because they're actually having problems with their thyroid. This is very common among bipolars. I'm not sure why. I should ask my doc someday.

Generally, I think the best way to frame the conversation is to approach her with the "I'm worried about you because..." and "I see this... happening and it worries me because ..." The hardest part is to convince someone to go to the doctor. One way to do that is to offer to go with her. If she seems very tense about it, but close to agreeing, offer to take her. That might help.

serafena
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum
Bipolar II

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