I just can't even imagine what you and your family are feeling as you are going thru this with your husband. Really hope he can be honest and ask for the help he needs, and I hope he is in a good facility where they can help him. But again, you have to WANT the help. For years my husband was in denial and thought everyone (me, the doctors and therapists) were all idiots and had no idea what they were talking about, that bipolar was a 'made up' condition. It took at least 5 years before I found a clinic with a great reputation to help him accept his illness. Even though, he still denies some of his behaviour.
It makes it hard to be someone's support system if they don't let you be.
Well, I am thinking of you and will say a prayer for you. Wish I could be more support, but we are all here 4 you.
Lots of love to you and your children as you move thru this,