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momofmany
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 58
   Posted 1/30/2009 10:51 AM (GMT -7)   
I usually post at the fibromyalgia site, but have a few questions for you guys.  I have guardianship of my 15 year old nephew.  He was taken from his fathers custody (for the second time) last november.  His father was extremely abusive, both physically and mentally to him.  He has been in counseling since he came back to live with us, and actually seems to be doing ok.  He has developed "night terrors" regarding his father, my husband and myself.  He dreams that his father is trying to harm us to be able to "get him back".  Other than the dreams haunt him, they are also starting to cause major ups and downs in his attitude.  His counselor and his school counselor think possibly bp, but his biggest problem is anger.  He gets so angry he "can't remember" things he has said and done during the day.  We have an appointment with a psychiatrist Wednesday, but was wondering if some of you could let me know what you think.


BD_spouse
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 175
   Posted 1/30/2009 11:58 AM (GMT -7)   

hmmm... i'm not a doctor, but as a mom, i would think that it is more due to trauma that he's having these emotional ups and downs.  My son was touched inappropriately by another child in our complex and started acting up really badly.  He was getting discipline notes sent home almost on a daily basis.  He was "caught" jabbing himself in the crotch with a pencil, he was caught trying to get other children to do sexually suggestive things as well.  He started having night terrors and his attitude was just off the wall.  It got to the point that he was being violent with other children and at lunch breaks had to be separated from most of his peers.  It wasn't until we sought counselling/help for him and got to the root of the problem that his attitude has changed... He hasn't brought home a discipline form in a couple months now and has even brought home a couple of "praise" reports. 

I would advise you as a mother to seek some serious counselling for your nephew.  You won't see results over night by any means, but I think medicating him prematurely will only push down his feelings instead of dealing with them.  He's been through some really traumatic things in his young age and a good trauma/abuse counsellor will really be able to zero in on the real issues.  Not to mention all the other things he's experience with puberty and body changes/emotional changes! ((HUGS))  This must be tough for you and I really commend you for taking on such an awesome responsibility.


"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do."
--
MARK TWAIN


momofmany
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 58
   Posted 1/30/2009 12:41 PM (GMT -7)   
He has really come a long way, he laughs, he plays, he actually acts like a normal 15 year old(most of the time). I actually have some midway serious anxiety issues, and take effexor 225mg a day, and up to 30mg of valium a day as needed. He has seen me without my meds, and actually was the one to ask if we could try to help him get someone to talk to so he might could get some kind of med. I explained very clearly that medicine does not "make everything go away", it only helps you deal with it. He is obsessive right now about "getting even" with dad. There are things that he is finally talking about to me and to his counselor that would make most adults cringe. His biggest fear is that somehow his dad will be able to convice the judges that he can take care of him, but the judge ordered multiple counseling at his dad's expense, and that is never going to happen, I mean this is the man that brought him to Oklahoma from New York and left him. He didn't even know who we were at 11. Also, I try to reassure him that in Ok you can legally choose where to live at the age of 13. He wants to be ok so bad, and my biggest concern is his dad is diagnosed schizophrenic, as well as 2 other cousins. He is terrified.....


bipolardude73
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 24
   Posted 1/30/2009 2:33 PM (GMT -7)   
Speaking as someone who was repeatedly abused by my father when I was young. It does sound like PTSD. I am 35 now and I STILL have flashbacks and night terrors. I had a doc tell me one time that all of my other issues (BP, OCD, Major Depression) stemmed from the trauma I experienced as a kid. If he is diagnosed with that, he will need a huge support group of people who love him and are willing to help him cope each day of his life because it is something that never goes away. He will also need to be watched for substance abuse because once he learns that the meds can make him numb, it can be very tempting to take more and more and more to make the pain go away. I do wish you the best of luck and hope that he can get help.
Diagnosed with Mixed Bipolar Disorder with hallucinations, PTSD, OCD and Major Depression since 1994.

Always feel free to email me- sometimes an email just to say Hello is the highlight of my day.


momofmany
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 58
   Posted 1/30/2009 2:42 PM (GMT -7)   
He has watched his father literally destroy himself with alcohol, drugs, etc.  His father has been institutionilized 4 different times since his teenage years.  He is actually my great nephew.  His father and my husband are uncle and nephew, yet only a year apart.  His fathers generation is the generation that seems prone to psychotic episodes....Diangosed schiczophrinia all the way to our daughter who as a teenager suffered from "severe mood swings" and depression.  Is is possible for mental illness to strike a single generation like that?  I know it is hereditary, but to what extent?


serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 1/30/2009 4:02 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi momofmany,

I just wanted to welcome you to our board and say thanks for joining us. You're getting some awesome feedback already. Bipolar is definitely genetic and it is linked to the genetics of depression as well. I can't say about schizophrenia, but I wouldn't be surprised if that were included as well. So I'm sure it's possible that a generation of a family could be struck particularly hard, especially if further back, say a grandparent, was disordered in some way.

I hope you find the support and answers you're looking for here,

serafena
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum
Bipolar II

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