Bipolar fiance

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Bullfrog
New Member


Date Joined Feb 2009
Total Posts : 4
   Posted 2/19/2009 4:07 PM (GMT -7)   
 My fiance and I are getting married in May.  She told me she has bipolar disorder pretty much right away in our relationship.  I have seen a few mood swings since then, but this past week I saw my first extreme case of mania.  While I dont like seeing her like that, it was good for me to witness it.  My feelings have not changed for her.  I want to be able to help her and take care her when she needs it.
Can any of you give me advice?  What should I do?  What do I NOT want to do? ETC?
 
Thanks
Bullfrog

Rocketman
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 156
   Posted 2/20/2009 11:29 AM (GMT -7)   

Bullfrog;

Welcome to our group. You were a little vague in your desription of her condition. Has she actually been diagnosed with this, or just thinks she has it? Is she on any kind of medications for it & on any kind of treatment plan such as counseling, therapy, & meeting with a psychiatrist. How long have you two been together? If you read a up on a lot of the posts you can see the kind of stuff to watch for & things that go on with someone with this condition. They biggest key to this condition is the right medication(s) & following the doctors advice with the treatment plan.

Stay in touch

Rocket


"The struggles make you stronger, and the changes make you wise, and happiness has it's own way of taking it's sweet time.
Gary Allan- From "Life Ain't Always Beutiful"


BD_spouse
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 175
   Posted 2/20/2009 11:38 AM (GMT -7)   
Well. My husband didn't exhibit any signs until after we were married - not that that would have changed anything at all... but it's good for you to witness it and still be willing to marry her. She's a lucky girl.
I'd tell you as a spouse of a BP person (although not officially diagnosed, already medicated as one) there isn't a lot you can do to stop an episode, but you might be able to do is lessen the effects it has on you, her and your relationship. What you can do for YOU is get some counselling because although you can 'handle' it right now, once you've gone through a few episodes with her, you might be asking yourself what we have all asked ourselves at one point or another... "why do we stay?".
Is she responsible about her BP? Does she have regular psych appointments? Does she acknowledge it? I think the best thing you can do is to be there for her. Try to recognize in advance if you see her cycling into an episode and get help before it happens.
Good Luck and if you need anything we're here to listen.
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do."
--
MARK TWAIN


shebsy
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 125
   Posted 2/20/2009 1:13 PM (GMT -7)   
The best way you can help any bipolar patient is by making sure they take their medication and see a psychiatrist and a counselor regularly. It is important for bipolar patients to take their medication and the medication changes depending upon their mood. Hence it is important to keep in touch with a psychiatrist who can adjust the medication accordingly.

serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 2/20/2009 9:11 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Bullfrog,

Welcome to HealingWell and to the bipolar board. It's good to have you.

The most important things for a bipolar patient are to keep taking their medication, keep up with their psychiatrist appointments, avoid stress whenever possible, and to get enough sleep. To the end that you can help her do these things, you will be doing great. Other than that, hold on through the mood swings, which are not much fun. Mania can be hurtful and cruel, especially if she stops taking her medication -- so really try and make sure she keeps taking it. Depression is dreary and soul-sucking. Both are very hard on spouses if the bipolar person takes their moods out on them.

With mania, make sure she gets to a doc. If it's really severe, they may have to hospitalize her to stabilize her mood again.

I hope this is somehow helpful,
serafena
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum
Bipolar II


Bullfrog
New Member


Date Joined Feb 2009
Total Posts : 4
   Posted 2/21/2009 7:59 AM (GMT -7)   
Rocketman said...

Bullfrog;

Welcome to our group. You were a little vague in your desription of her condition. Has she actually been diagnosed with this, or just thinks she has it? Is she on any kind of medications for it & on any kind of treatment plan such as counseling, therapy, & meeting with a psychiatrist. How long have you two been together? If you read a up on a lot of the posts you can see the kind of stuff to watch for & things that go on with someone with this condition. They biggest key to this condition is the right medication(s) & following the doctors advice with the treatment plan.

Stay in touch

Rocket

Sorry I didnt read other posts first.  I do not have the time this week.  Im working tons of OT.  So, between that and vising my fiance (Ill care her K) in the hospital, its been a crazy week. 
K was diagnosed with Bipolar disorder many years ago.  She has been regluated by her meds ever since.  Of course she has had a few eposides on either end of the scale.  She meets regularily with a meds coordinater.
K and I have been together a little over a year.  In that time this is the first major mood swing she has had.  She did have a minor swing towards depression last summer, which she had to scale back her hours at work.
She is on several medications.  She has at least 2 or 3 for controlling the mood swings.  earlier this month her Dr. told her she could try to slowly come off one of them (cant remember the name of which one).  She wanted to see if she would be able to get off any of them, so she could get pregant later this year or next.  I think that between that and the stress of going back to college and planning our wedding helped trigger this attach for her.
Anyway she know she needs to stay on the meds. 
any comments are much appreciated, Thanks!
BULLFROG
 


Bullfrog
New Member


Date Joined Feb 2009
Total Posts : 4
   Posted 2/21/2009 8:09 AM (GMT -7)   
Another question for you all:
Is it normal for hopitals not allow patients to switch psych doctors? K is very uncomfortable with her current one, and wants to switch to a woman doctor. She has asked about it while she has been in the hospital, but has been told that it is against hospital policy to allow switching. This doesnt make sence to me. I figure that since we live in America we should be able to choose which ever doctor we want.
Is there anything she can do to get a different Dr?

Thanks
Bullfrog

Rocketman
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 156
   Posted 2/21/2009 8:54 AM (GMT -7)   

Bullfrog;

Like the others & I have said, her staying on her med/treatment plan is the best thing for her. As far as switching docs, maybe it is just hospital policy that she can't do it while she is in, but once she is released, I would think she should be able to. Hope she is doing well.

Rocket


"The struggles make you stronger, and the changes make you wise, and happiness has it's own way of taking it's sweet time.
Gary Allan- From "Life Ain't Always Beutiful"


serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 2/21/2009 10:23 AM (GMT -7)   
Yes, I think Rocketman is right about the hospital. Certain doctors are affiliated with certain hospitals, so you can only use their docs. But once you're out, you can use any doc you want.

serafena
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum
Bipolar II

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