I am glad your hubby and you have seen the P-doc and that you have a therapy session lined up.
I know that being the spouse of a person with depression is tough as I have depression and I have been a handful for my hubby but he has hung in there and yes he gets upset with me and frustrated but I know that I just need to try harder sometimes and not give into my anxiety or depression.
Bipolar is a whole other disorder and much more difficult then having a unipolar disorder.
The first thing to know is that bipolar people usually hurt the one person they love the most. So, take it as a compliment, ha-ha! Many times they try to hide their behavior from others, which makes you look crazy for complaining about this wonderful actor.
To understand how to help you, the non bipolar one, you need to understand the symptoms of bipolar. Bipolar people have mood swings called manic episodes and low episodes, with a little bit of normal between the two. Bipolar people are also known for suicidal thoughts and psychosis. Remember this is a disorder and he is not out to get you.
Manic episode would be an over excited time where everything is great and wonderful. This is the time that bipolar people will make destructive decisions that seem like fun. Sex, drugs, alcohol, and foolish spending are some of the spontaneous fun that can lead to some long term negative consequences.
Low episode would be a depressed time where everything is awful, there is no point in getting up or doing anything with anyone. One trigger of a low is the consequences of a manic time. You had a great time, but now you are broke and you don't have the money for your car payment, food, rent, gas, etc...
Counseling and communication are essential to a successful marriage that deals with a bipolar. Find a counselor who you can trust and where you can attend the counselling sessions. Bipolar people tend to lie or leave valuable information out of their story, making it hard for a counselor to get anything accomplished. You also need counselling just as much as your partner, if not more. Find a counselor who will listen to you, guide you, and one who will give you a safe place to vent. The counselor should help you communicate with your spouse so that both of your opinions count and are meaningful.
Medication is a must! You need to make sure he takes his medications consistently.
It takes a strong person with unconditional love to stay married to a bipolar person. Find a support system where they understand what you are going through. Learn how to stand on your own two feet to handle the problems as they come up and if that means cleaning up his messes, too, so be it.
I am proud of you for coming here and opening up to the members of this forum.............that is one way you have used a support network to help you.
Keep on talking to the wonderful members of this forum. They live the life and they are the experts.
Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& Moderator GERD Forums
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Not a mental health professional of any kind
Peace does not dwell in outward things, but within the soul
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