Post Edited (keepinghope) : 4/16/2009 5:23:49 PM (GMT-6)
First off Keepinghope, when you said she filed for divorce I had the mistaken impression that it was just a mood swing and she retracted it. After your clarification my reply sounds rude and I didn't intend it that way.
After reading your last reply it does sound like at least a separation would do you both some good. However, you talk about her "growing up" and realizing her mistake. The question that brings up is does she ever have moments where she apologizes for the way she acts and tries to fix things? Because if the answer is no, maybe she really is just selfish and being BP has nothing to do with it.
Sometimes the only thing that keeps my marriage working is when my wife's mood swings level out and she makes it clear that she didn't mean what she said and that she's sorry for what happened. Even then, when she's on a bad manic cycle, I start to believe that she means what she says even though I know better. Lord knows that if she didn't "come back" I would have come to believe she felt that way and left years ago.
If I were you, and I'm not and I'm not an expert so this opinion is worth the electrons that print it, I'd just focus on the kids for now. Don't disrespect your wife in front of them, but you don't have to hide the truth. Make sure they know they are loved by both of you and look out for them during the divorce.
After all is done, look to yourself. As a friend of mine has said, the best way to get back at an ex is to succeed.