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poodles
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 180
   Posted 5/8/2009 11:00 AM (GMT -7)   
How did the meeting with your husband and his docs and social worker go? I hope he made the progress you were hoping for.
Just thinking about you.
Vickie

Fibromyalgia, Bipolar II, Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome, Clinical Depression, Arthritis, High Blood Pressure, etc.


BPWife
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 139
   Posted 5/8/2009 12:02 PM (GMT -7)   
Thanks for posting Poodles.

Things went pretty well at the meeting last week. He told us that he doesn't think the lithium works but when we said that when he gets out of the hospital and is on the lithium, he's an entirely different person than when he's off it. We all said that when he's on it, he's the loving caring person we know he is and when he's off, he's mean and nasty and aggressive and we don't love or like him. He did get upet at the end when he found out that I took 100% control of ALL the money, but he just walked out which even the dr said was progress because he wouldn't have done that a few days earlier. That night on the phone we had a long talk and I got very upset and started crying while saying "you are killing me by not taking care of yourself." I think that he finally saw how heartbreaking it is for me and his mom. After our visits on Saturday, he finally agreed to meet me half way with trying to manage his condition by going to therapy and taking his lithium.

He got out Tuesday and we spent Wednesday returning all the things he bought while he was manic. It was good for him to have to do it (in the past someone has always done it for him) and see that he bought things he normally NEVER would have. For example, he bought two laptops and had them configured. We did plan on getting one for his mom but the second one? we're not sure why he bought it. Anyway, when we picked them up he saw that he spent just over $300 on installing items that he could have and would have done himself.

He even apologized for hurting me and putting me through this - a first! Of course I'm still apprehensive that he will become non-compliant again but I am a little hopeful in that he's been taking his meds without reminding him to and he's put his therapy session on the calendar. I know we have a lot of work to do and that there's a possibility that he'll have another episode. Hopefully, with therapy he'll see that there is nothing WRONG with him; just that he's got a medical condition to manage. I just keep telling him how much I love him and am glad that the man I married is back.

And a BIG BIG thank you to everyone who helped me through these very difficult three weeks. I definitely could not have done it without you!

BPWife

poodles
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 180
   Posted 5/8/2009 12:10 PM (GMT -7)   
That's great that he has made that progress. I want to remind you, you are under a lot of strain right now. Find time to take out just for you to unwind, relax. He needs you, but he needs you well. And so do you.
Lots of thoughts and hugs coming your way!
Vickie

Fibromyalgia, Bipolar II, Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome, Anxiety, Arthritis, High Blood Pressure, etc.


BPWife
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 139
   Posted 5/8/2009 2:16 PM (GMT -7)   
I do feel like he's made some progress - especially with accepting his condition - which is good. Are we totally there - no. But, is he at least trying to get there - right now yes. I'm keeping my fingers crossed because every baby step is a step closer to him geting better.

Yes, I know part of helping and supporting him is to take care of myself first. That's why I decided to see a therapist and will continue to see one. And honestly, writing here has also been a great outlet for me.

BPWife

BD_spouse
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 175
   Posted 5/8/2009 3:38 PM (GMT -7)   
I'd say accepting his condition is a pretty huge step. You and I have struggled so much lately BPWife - we must really love our husbands to stick this out for so long. I hope he continues to show improvement (HUGS)
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed
by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do."
--
MARK TWAIN


poodles
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 180
   Posted 5/8/2009 4:36 PM (GMT -7)   
As a bp sufferer, I can say that I am impressed with anyone who chooses to stick it out with one of us. My husband is my rock! and I am so blessed to have him.
Yes, you must love them alot. Also, you probably have a thing about commitment...when you say you will "til death do us part", you really mean to try to do just that.
So, in case your spouse is not telling you at this time, let me say...THANK YOU to all of you who are sticking by one of us.
We love you for it. Even if we can't speak a civil word to you!! rolleyes
Vickie

Fibromyalgia, Bipolar II, Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome, Anxiety, Arthritis, High Blood Pressure, etc.

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