Thank you for replying, at this stage when things are so new any perspective helps. I realize nothing's for certain, but I do believe from the bottom of my heart that I am prepared to do anything to make this work. She's such a beautiful person when she's stable, and I want her in my life even though it is going to be very hard. She has the same issue you describe - she easily gets frustrated with things and give up. I guess it is amazing it has taken this long to get to the first "I want to leave the marriage" incident. That's still the one thing that's crushing my soul.
All I want from her is time, time to find the right meds, dosages; time to stabilize her mood; time to work on actual issues in the marriage. I just don't want her to pick up and leave in the midst of the first major episode she's had, but of course that is the one thing I can't control.
It was like I was reading a book on my life with my husband. I was the one who always did the things she does, and he sticks with me for 30 years. I can only suggest that she may need a mood stablizer to help the moods. You can take antidepressants, but should take a mood stabilizer with it. That is just something that has helped me. I am on an antidepressant, mood stabilzer, and anti psychotic, and for me it is finally working. Please discuss it with her or even call her psych doctor and tell him about the extreme mood changes he only see's her for a short time you see her all the times so he should listen to you, but you may have to keep the conversation with the doc from your wife. You sound like you have her best intrest in your heart so you may want to make the call. Good Luck