Please keep posting Peachlove. There hasn't been a lot of activity at all on the forum in the last few days -- it's been the weekend, and it's always slow on the weekend. There's really just the one topic we have to avoid. I'm sorry we can't discuss that here, but it's illegal and controversial, so we have to avoid it.
But you're in pain, you're in need, and I think having somewhere to vent is important. Please do keep posting. There's no harm in making several posts if you feel the need.
The er will not do you much good if you are not suicidal or homicidal. There's really nothing they can do for you otherwise. An inpatient facility only takes patients from the ER in those cases. That's not to say your situation isn't really desperate. I totally understand how you feel. I've been there myself -- that unbearable sensation that you just can't take one more minute inside your own head. But you've got to make a plan to get through to the 7th. You will make it. It's only a week away. You can do that.
Think of something you can do every single day to take your mind off of your depression -- take your daughter to the park, swimming, to the library, make bread, see a friend, something for everyday -- just one thing so that you have something to look forward to, but it won't be so taxing that you can't handle it. Try and get a nap in every day, but not too long. Make a list of the things you want to tell the doctor about, so you're prepared. Do you have plans for the 4th? Try making some. You said you've recently moved. I have a 4 year old too -- are you planning on taking yours to fireworks (can yours stay up that late, mine can't.)
Slow down and try to relax. You're gonna be okay. Make sure you tell the doc, when you see him or her, that you need generic prescriptions because money is tight and you have no insurance.
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum