I am new to this site, but i have read a lot of the post here and they have actually gave me hope and comfort that i am not alone in this battle. I will try and so my best to explain my situation, i am going through a very bad depressed stage right now and it is very hard to consintrate and explain things so here goes. There has been something wrong with me as long as i can remember. Growing up i always had problems with concentrating and anxiety. I was given ridelin when i was younger because i was thought to be ADD. Ridelin did not help me. Some how i made it through my teens by self medicating my self with drugs and alcohol. When i turned 21 i got severe depression and was given every antidepressant under the sun with no success. I tried to committ suicide and was hospitalized. While i was in the hospital they gave me effexor and luvox. The doc gave me luvox because i convinced him and myself that i obsesse(spelling??) over every little thing in my life, i guess that drug is for obsessive compulsive dissorder. I dont have the actions of that like tieing my shoes over and over ect.. i do bite my nails alot.. anyways something helped me mentally while i was on those meds, but had serious sexual side effects. I stopped taking the meds a couple months after i got out of the hospital thinking i didnt need them anymore, i was wrong. My doctor said it was the luvox that gave me the bad sexual side effects, so i just took the effexor which did not help. So i tried different meds that didnt work and finally gave up and tried self help CDs and back to self medicating for the next 6-7 yrs. I am 30 now and have been trying meds on and off for the past 2 yrs with no success. I hurt my back again last yr(had surgery when i was 20, started the severe depression) and was given cortizone shots. These cortizone shots apparently sent me into a hypermania stage, which gave me extra energy, concentration, confidence, creativity for like a month and then slowly went away and depression set in again. Which brings me to where i am at right now. I went in to see my doctor and was going to try the luvox again because that is pretty much how i felt when i got out of the hospital, but after telling him my experience over the last yr he seems to think that the cortizone shots sent me into a hypermania state and he diagnosed me as bipolar type 1 or 2(the one where you are manly depressed) and he gave me Lamictal(the generic). I have been taking it for about a month and just took my first 100mg tablet last nite. I do not feel any better or worse, very little side effects. I had the "shocks" the first couple days i took them, but nothing since. Im trying to hold out and hopefully this stuff starts to work, but each day is a struggle. If anyone has any insite on my situation i would appreciate it. Right now all i can think is maybe i should have just took the luvox. On the other hand if lamictal can help with hardly any side effects that would be great.
thanks for listening.