Life is really getting me down- afraid of slipping too far

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_Christina
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 553
   Posted 7/30/2009 2:49 PM (GMT -7)   
I have a lot of pain from Rheumatoid arthritis that goes up and down in cycles.  This makes my bipolar difficult to handle because some of the medications "don't play well together."
Today I have joint pain that just won't quit, but I am also really down emotionaly.  I am weepy, my head hurts, I want to go to sleep, everything seems like too much of a struggle.  Worse than my pain is an ache in my chest that has nothing to do with my physical pain.  It is an emotional ache that just doesn't go away.  All I want is to make it stop. 
I read the last paragraph and I think I will call my phyc and see if I can ajust my meds for the night.  I am home alone for the night (my kids are camping for the night with my parents and my husband will go to work soon overnight) and I really don't trust myself to not wallow in my self pity tonight. 
I may be back for the company later.
 Christina
Even though I do not understand where I am going on the path that God has laid out for me, I must submit to His plan and trust that He will take me where I need to be. 
 
Current medications:
Bipolar treatment-Lamictal, 200mg, Mood stabelizer, daily(main side effect: brain fog) Bipolar treatment-Cymbalta, 40mg, Antidepressant, daily(main side effect: GI upset, decreased clotting, insominia) Anemia, Fatigue treatment- Iron supplement, 65mg, daily(main side effect: constipation) Insominia treatment- Ambien, 10mg, daily(main side effect: amnesia eppisodes between taking pill and falling asleep) Mania treatment- Alprazolam, .25mg, Very rarely(main side effect: fatigue, slowing of thoughts, depression of CNS, can't take ambien or vicodin when on it) RA treatment- Plaquenil, 400mg, daily(main side effect: GI upset, decreased clotting) RA treatment- Methotrexate, 25mg, 1X weekly(main side effects: hair loss, stomach upset, mouth sores, sore muscles, fatigue, brain fog, compromised immune system, decreased Folic Acid absorption) GI upset treatment- Leucovorin Calcium, 10mg 1x weekly(main side effects: ?) Folic Acid defintioncy- Folic Acid, 1mg, daily(main side effects: ?) Multi-mineral Supplement (main side effects: constipation, GI upset) Constipation treatment- Docusate Sodium, 200mg, daily(main side effects:?) pain control- Motrin, 800mg, PRN Q6hours daily(main side effects: GI upset, decreased clotting) Pain Control- Vicodin, 5-500mg, PRN Q12hours 3-4 times weekly (main side effects: brain fog, fatigue)
 
 
 
 


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 7/30/2009 2:56 PM (GMT -7)   
Christina
I am so sorry to hear you having a bad day.  I have had those days where life is just not as good as it could be and no matter how hard we try we are sure glad when bedtime gets here and the day is over.

I do hope you called you Doc and an adjustment in your meds was in order.

Please know I care and if you need anything let me know. 

Gentle Hugs to you,

Kitt



 

Kitt,
Moderator: Osteoarthritis, GERD/Heartburn
Anxiety/Panic, & Depression
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"When you find peace within yourself, you become the kind of person who can live at peace with others."
Not a mental health professional of any kind


_Christina
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 553
   Posted 7/30/2009 7:40 PM (GMT -7)   

I'm back.  I just missed my psy doc when I called- so I can't ask her about ajusting the antidepressants till am.  By then I will already be over the night.  At 9 am I have an appt with a new rheumy doc in the town next to mine.  My old one didn't take my BP seriously enough (I think) and so I am going to a new one.

I want to sleep, but it just isn't coming.  I don't want to leave the TV in my livingroom because it is a distraction in a too quiet house.


 Christina
Even though I do not understand where I am going on the path that God has laid out for me, I must submit to His plan and trust that He will take me where I need to be. 
 
Current medications:
Bipolar treatment-Lamictal, 200mg, Mood stabelizer, daily(main side effect: brain fog) Bipolar treatment-Cymbalta, 40mg, Antidepressant, daily(main side effect: GI upset, decreased clotting, insominia) Anemia, Fatigue treatment- Iron supplement, 65mg, daily(main side effect: constipation) Insominia treatment- Ambien, 10mg, daily(main side effect: amnesia eppisodes between taking pill and falling asleep) Mania treatment- Alprazolam, .25mg, Very rarely(main side effect: fatigue, slowing of thoughts, depression of CNS, can't take ambien or vicodin when on it) RA treatment- Plaquenil, 400mg, daily(main side effect: GI upset, decreased clotting) RA treatment- Methotrexate, 25mg, 1X weekly(main side effects: hair loss, stomach upset, mouth sores, sore muscles, fatigue, brain fog, compromised immune system, decreased Folic Acid absorption) GI upset treatment- Leucovorin Calcium, 10mg 1x weekly(main side effects: ?) Folic Acid defintioncy- Folic Acid, 1mg, daily(main side effects: ?) Multi-mineral Supplement (main side effects: constipation, GI upset) Constipation treatment- Docusate Sodium, 200mg, daily(main side effects:?) pain control- Motrin, 800mg, PRN Q6hours daily(main side effects: GI upset, decreased clotting) Pain Control- Vicodin, 5-500mg, PRN Q12hours 3-4 times weekly (main side effects: brain fog, fatigue)
 
 
 
 


MMMNAVY
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 6927
   Posted 7/31/2009 5:16 AM (GMT -7)   
Christina, I hope this finds you doing better, I had a thought about your RA (I take MTX shots too) have you ever microwaved damp towels and put it around the joints that are bothering you?
Forum Co-moderator - Crohn's Disease/Thyroid Disorders:_All comments have the caveat contact your local health care provider.

I will find a way or make one. –Phillip Sidney 1554-1586

All that I am and all that I shall ever be, I owe to my Angel Mother.

The Bucket List- Have you found joy in your life?  Has your life brought joy to others?

Make sure your suffering has meaning…


_Christina
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 553
   Posted 8/2/2009 3:13 PM (GMT -7)   
I am feeing a bit better. My extended family all lwent camping and really wanted me to go- but I felt too down to make the effort. My husband actually got a bit snippy with me and said that he thinks I should just go, spend the evening at the campfire and return the next day. It really helped going out (even it it was under duress) and I felt I could keep myself presentable all day.
I got home later in the night than I planned last night, and at church this am I was weary, weepy and sore but I am glad that I went. It has made a diffrence.
I went to the new rheumy doc on friday am and I described how connected the BP and the arthritis is in my treatment. I explained how sometimes I have little to no tolerance for pain, and other times I might not notice it at all. I explained how I I have trouble controling the BP when the treatment for the RA keeps changing and isn't effective yet. My last rheumy did not respond to this information- this one acknoledged it and ajusted treatment to a more agressive approach. The more under control the arthritis is, the more under control the BP will be. (I hope)
One good peice of info is that I passed through one more hoop in getting social security disability for the BP/RA conditions. Not sure how many left there is to go, but still. I assume the longer they hold on to it to decide the better my chances of getting approved.
The rheumy doc put me on prednisone to control some joint pain that I have right now, which is a steriod, so it puts me in an artificial mini "high". I only seem to have problems with regular manic phases when I am on it. This time it is a really low dose and only for 4 weeks. I hope it wll kick me out of this "low" mood as a "side" effect. The only problem with that is that I had an artificial/prolonged "low" mood when I got off prednisone last time. I hoe it will be diffrent this time because last time I was on a much higher dose and on it for almost a year.
I'm rambling a bit today because I took vicodin today while I was at church for RA joint pain. I like having it availible when I need it- nut I don't like the was it makes me loopy for hours.
I hope you all are all right. I'm glad to connect with uu all again.
 Christina
Even though I do not understand where I am going on the path that God has laid out for me, I must submit to His plan and trust that He will take me where I need to be. 
 
Current medications:
Bipolar treatment-Lamictal, 200mg, Mood stabelizer, daily(main side effect: brain fog) Bipolar treatment-Cymbalta, 40mg, Antidepressant, daily(main side effect: GI upset, decreased clotting, insominia) Anemia, Fatigue treatment- Iron supplement, 65mg, daily(main side effect: constipation) Insominia treatment- Ambien, 10mg, daily(main side effect: amnesia eppisodes between taking pill and falling asleep) Mania treatment- Alprazolam, .25mg, Very rarely(main side effect: fatigue, slowing of thoughts, depression of CNS, can't take ambien or vicodin when on it) RA treatment- Plaquenil, 400mg, daily(main side effect: GI upset, decreased clotting) RA treatment- Methotrexate, 25mg, 1X weekly(main side effects: hair loss, stomach upset, mouth sores, sore muscles, fatigue, brain fog, compromised immune system, decreased Folic Acid absorption) GI upset treatment- Leucovorin Calcium, 10mg 1x weekly(main side effects: ?) Folic Acid defintioncy- Folic Acid, 1mg, daily(main side effects: ?) Multi-mineral Supplement (main side effects: constipation, GI upset) Constipation treatment- Docusate Sodium, 200mg, daily(main side effects:?) pain control- Motrin, 800mg, PRN Q6hours daily(main side effects: GI upset, decreased clotting) Pain Control- Vicodin, 5-500mg, PRN Q12hours 3-4 times weekly (main side effects: brain fog, fatigue)
 
 
 
 


serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 8/2/2009 5:50 PM (GMT -7)   
I'm sorry to hear you're struggling so, _Christina. I wish I could make it better. Hold on til monday and then call that doc!

serafena
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum
Bipolar II

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