Hi everyone, been going through my trials and tribulations. For a quick catch up, I am still out on stress leave from work. It is taking a lot of rest to get me caught up. It has been 6 weeks now. I am better, the panic and anxiety attacks are calming (as long as the office no longer calls), the depression is still here but lessoning over time and life at home is so-so. My H is loving and supportive one day, and a pain in the rear and impossible the next. My kids are overall trying hard to be supportive of me, however my oldest is starting to really buck heads with his dad. Not only are they both BPII, but he is at the stage of being a teenager where the pounding on the chest begins. I feel bad for him. His dad is really hard on him, and some of the time my S is stepping in to defend me right now since I don't have the stamina. My S gets mad that his dad is having such exaggerated reactions to such trivial and small things. He really thinks it is unfair. I couldn't agree more. It is VERY hard to live with and my H simply doesn't see it. I am still seeing the pdoc and therapist. I am hoping to be ready to seek a new position by month’s end. I guess when you push yourself to the breaking point to keep it all together when you are the none BP in the house....we can crack too. Although in my case, it was having a highly abusive work situation that pushed me over the brink. I am doing better though, and will be just fine in time. I just have not been too up to writing. But I do stop by and read posts occasionally. In time, I will be back more. Hugs to you all, and wishing you well. LFW
LFW--big, big hugs!! I am so sorry to hear you have been struggling. I am so glad however that you have taken the time for yourself, and you are away from that abuse at work. I can relate to that kind of treatment in the workplace and how it effects us all. My heart goes out to your son. He must be going through so much right now, and it sounds like you are in a tough position....all the while, you need to try to focus on yourself to get well! My...! Well, I know that you can get through this. It will take time, but it's good that you have the professional support in place. That is really important. I hope that you find the new job you need for when you get back on your feet. You deserve the best for yourself.
As for me, I have been away from HW for a bit now too. I will be posting an update later today. More big hugs, talk soon. Take care of yourself LFW.