***? I hate my life!

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Angela40045
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2009
Total Posts : 24
   Posted 1/3/2010 6:18 PM (GMT -7)   
I am actually confused today. I feel like noone likes me in this group
and that noone cares. Why you ask?
I am feeling like I work so hard to be a part of this group, to help
support, and share emotions, let alone make Videos on our Bipolar
disease and not anyone in this group is really interested in what I
say or do. Why you ask?

Here I create my own youtube channel to share with the bipolar world,
in the hopes that other bipolar people will comment on my videos. Do
they? No. I just am so frustrated, because I want to know what people
think of my work. Am I appreciated? Right now this is how I
feel......not at home does anyone care, not outside of home does any
care, and nor on the internet or in the support groups does anyone
care. I feel Alone, Lost, and like there is really no reason to be on
this planet. So what am I here for? To do the laundry, to cook, to
babysit, to clean house, to kiss ass, to please everyone, and me I get
nothing?

If you really care ..... this is how I feel:
http://www.onetruemedia.com/shared?p=a1a90639893bc5f94ae191&skin_id=701

Why are people so afaid to comment on this???? Did I do all this for
Nothing?


 
 

Come see my YouTube Channel on my struggles with Bipolar: http://www.youtube.com/user/SmellingDaisies
 
Read my Personal Diary on Bipolar: http://sites.google.com/site/angelaledckeandbipolar/
 
 


serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 1/3/2010 6:26 PM (GMT -7)   
Angela,

I think you will find that the group has been VEEEEEEERY slow lately. We're getting a post, maybe two a day. That's the case all the way across HealingWell. It's not that no one is interested in your work, but rather that we have had only a few visitors and very few posts by regulars in the last week and a half. Even I have been only "checking in" this week. The reason should be obvious.

I think, rather than lashing out, you could have simply said that you were hoping for more feedback on your videos. That would have saved you the trouble of getting frustrated, and possibly alienating people by being aggressive.

I thought your video was very well done, but too sad for me to watch all the way through. I trigger depressive very easily and I associate the first song with the movie Girl, Interrupted, which was brutally triggering for me. Keep up the good work, though. I think anything which spreads bipolar awareness is helpful.

Best,

Serafena
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar and Depression Forums
Bipolar II

"Bipolar disorder can be a great teacher. It's a challenge, but it can set you up to be able to do almost anything else in your life." - CARRIE FISHER


mommy.michele
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2007
Total Posts : 369
   Posted 1/3/2010 9:27 PM (GMT -7)   
Angela...this is not a greatly traveled site. If what you are looking for is video critique, then maybe you should find a website that specializes in that.

Everyone here suffers in a different way, many people trigger into depression very easily, and avoid watching things like that. You can definitely not take it personally that not many have seen it yet. And also a lot of people may have seen it, but just are not the commenting type.

I also doubt you will get much more feedback after an outburst like that.
Isn't it nice to think that tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it yet? - L. M. Montgomery


Angela40045
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2009
Total Posts : 24
   Posted 1/4/2010 6:49 AM (GMT -7)   
Yeah, yesterday I was in a bad cycle, and I should have stopped for a minute and not been so irrational when I posted about my video.

I want to apologize to everyone. I didn't mean to sound so aggressive, nor should I have lashed out.

Angela
 
 

Come see my YouTube Channel on my struggles with Bipolar: http://www.youtube.com/user/SmellingDaisies
 
Read my Personal Diary on Bipolar: http://sites.google.com/site/angelaledckeandbipolar/
 
 


serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 1/4/2010 8:20 AM (GMT -7)   
It's all okay.

Hope you're feeling better today!

Be well,
serafena
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar and Depression Forums
Bipolar II

"Bipolar disorder can be a great teacher. It's a challenge, but it can set you up to be able to do almost anything else in your life." - CARRIE FISHER


sukay
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 1432
   Posted 1/4/2010 11:02 AM (GMT -7)   

((Hugs)) 

I'm very irritable too so I totally understand!

It's good that you can apologize!  Pat yourself on the back for that!!!  Seriously!!!

I'm too stubborn to do that right now!devil nono mad  cry


~sukay~
Anxiety/Panic  
Bipolar - 2004
     Crohns disease - 1995 
Arthritis & Fibromyalgia 
 
Leo Buscaglia


serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 1/5/2010 8:39 AM (GMT -7)   
Thank you, Stormienight,

Be well,
serafena
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar and Depression Forums
Bipolar II

"Bipolar disorder can be a great teacher. It's a challenge, but it can set you up to be able to do almost anything else in your life." - CARRIE FISHER


Sharann
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2005
Total Posts : 778
   Posted 1/5/2010 9:43 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Angela,
I saw your video and it is my life. I thought it was beautifully done and very amazing.
Right now I am feeling scared and alone but glad to be understood.
It took guts to make that video. Kudos.
Be well
Shar
I am a Certified Doxie Lover(Weinerdogs)


Ruth 56
New Member


Date Joined Nov 2009
Total Posts : 4
   Posted 1/8/2010 8:18 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Angela,
I am also bipolar and I watched your video and you did a great job at showing the feelings that I have on alot of days! Thank you for letting me know that someone understands what I go threw and have the feelings that I have! I look forward to getting to know you better and seeing more of your work! It's amazing and so are you! Thank you so much! Ruth

bucci
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2006
Total Posts : 1477
   Posted 1/10/2010 2:09 AM (GMT -7)   
angela, i saw your video and it was great. tried to respond on utube but got all flustered when they asked for the user name and password. drives me nuts.
also if you notice on the responding thing even on the forum it is maybe a 10% of the people that read that comment back.
look at this post. 174 people read ...8 ,,,now 9 responded. no big deal.. the main thing is that you put a great video together and I hope a lot of eople get to see it .. especially people like me that have been in denial for 35 yrs.
I think it is where the other illness start because being depressed reaks havoc on your immune system and the whole herriditary thing is true. then your parent's dusguise it with drinking or stuff like that and you never know if you are up late or out early. so everything that can be done to show us the real picture is great. your video is my life and it finally showed it to me ...so crystal. thank you

bucci
hep c , lyme
Dad has lyme


Angela40045
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2009
Total Posts : 24
   Posted 1/11/2010 4:06 PM (GMT -7)   
I am so please with everyone. I have been getting a lot of Great feedback, and knowing my Video touches my Bipolar friends in this community, has made me feel good about something I have done for once!
 
 

Come see my YouTube Channel on my struggles with Bipolar: http://www.youtube.com/user/SmellingDaisies
 
Read my Personal Diary on Bipolar: http://sites.google.com/site/angelaledckeandbipolar/
 
 

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