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jenbug
New Member


Date Joined Mar 2010
Total Posts : 13
   Posted 3/4/2010 9:48 AM (GMT -7)   
I have been bipolar for 18 years and the past five I have been on medication. My problem is lately some of my oldest friends have expressed to me that they would rather just not deal with me because I am always negative. Keep in mind I just got full time employment after being laid off for a year and a half...my father just finished chemo for cancer...my grandfather was diagnosed with aortic stenosis and I just ended a 7 year relationship that was unhealthy for me. So of course I might not always be in the best of moods lately. My question is....what do you do with the friends that don't really believe in mental illness. They think I can make myself feel better and don't believe in medication or therapy. I have printed lots of literature for them to read and even asked them if they would come to a session with me...they declined...is it time to get rid of these friends?

tortoise11
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 2896
   Posted 3/4/2010 11:34 AM (GMT -7)   

Yes.

 

shakehead

jenbug
New Member


Date Joined Mar 2010
Total Posts : 13
   Posted 3/4/2010 12:22 PM (GMT -7)   
I know what's best for me....it's just hard. However, I do have a few friends that understand.

Crohnie4Life
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 69
   Posted 3/5/2010 9:15 PM (GMT -7)   
I second that yes.

serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 3/6/2010 9:19 AM (GMT -7)   
jenbug,

Mental disorders are frightening to people. You'd think they were "catching". LOL. But truly, adversity lets us know who our true friends are. I'm sorry your friends can't stick by you when you need them most -- but I tell you what -- there are better friends out there who will.

Be well,
serafena
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar and Depression Forums
Bipolar II

"Bipolar disorder can be a great teacher. It's a challenge, but it can set you up to be able to do almost anything else in your life." - CARRIE FISHER


serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 3/6/2010 9:22 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi It's Genetic,

Welcome to HealingWell and the bipolar board. It's good to have you!

serafena
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar and Depression Forums
Bipolar II

"Bipolar disorder can be a great teacher. It's a challenge, but it can set you up to be able to do almost anything else in your life." - CARRIE FISHER


Mildlybipolar
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2010
Total Posts : 56
   Posted 3/7/2010 5:12 PM (GMT -7)   
Hey Jenbug, these people don't sound like very good friends in the first place. One of the greatest weapons I learned against depression is that negative emotions, especially justifiable ones, are completely within human nature.

I think your friends, weren't filling their role in these friendships by not understanding what immense emotional stress you must've been enduring.

For what you were going through, you had every right in the world to be down. Anyone else would've been feeling the same way.

jenbug
New Member


Date Joined Mar 2010
Total Posts : 13
   Posted 3/8/2010 2:31 PM (GMT -7)   
thanks everyone for the kind words! Your right it's genetic...i am kind to a fault...i let people walk all over me and am ALWAYs there for everyone and don't put myself first...but i have been really good about keeping the negative at bay...for now! I am trying to practice not being a door mat and saying no to people sometimes!

Cateyes
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2010
Total Posts : 89
   Posted 3/9/2010 7:25 AM (GMT -7)   
jenbug,
it's kinda funny how we all wear our hearts on our sleave,  Theses so called friends are not your friends.  Friends are the ones who love you even when your down.  You will only find very few of these in life.  Let them go find true people who love all sides of you not the ones who r just along for a good ride if your happy.  You also have so much going on personally.  Good for you getting out of an unhealthy relationship.  Most bp people can't they become addicted to other people and feel they cannot be with anyone who will understand them so I commend you on that.  This is a real disorder so you cannot make yourself better but reconizing your symptoms can help you controll the onset of bigger issues.  Just remember your not alone and self awareness is half the battle to this disorder.  For bp people it is a trigger as far as change goes to be unemployed.  Any amount of change is so look for symptoms.  Being negative is part of it but I try to offset my issues by living by a little trick i use on myself everyday I get up I secretly look in the mirror and say I love myself and today will be better than yesterday and someone will love me to.  It's kinda a self help tip.   jenbug said...
I have been bipolar for 18 years and the past five I have been on medication. My problem is lately some of my oldest friends have expressed to me that they would rather just not deal with me because I am always negative. Keep in mind I just got full time employment after being laid off for a year and a half...my father just finished chemo for cancer...my grandfather was diagnosed with aortic stenosis and I just ended a 7 year relationship that was unhealthy for me. So of course I might not always be in the best of moods lately. My question is....what do you do with the friends that don't really believe in mental illness. They think I can make myself feel better and don't believe in medication or therapy. I have printed lots of literature for them to read and even asked them if they would come to a session with me...they declined...is it time to get rid of these friends?
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