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Deacon Blues
Regular Member

Date Joined Oct 2006
Total Posts : 272
   Posted 3/13/2010 4:12 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi all,
Posted here a couple weeks ago. I am UC patient from their discussion and am in search of what the flip is going wrong with me. I have taken the online bipolar screenings and have score as bipolar every time. I am looking for a psychiatrist presently and have not been Dx'd with anything thus far. I'm just crazy with something; anxiety, depression, energy, lethargy...I am very social person, well liked, in nursing school, active musician, work 3 12 hour shifts per week as a CNA at the hospital (which I know night shift is terrible for anyone)...I hold things together pretty well, but when I am alone I just flippin blow up about stuff!!! I cuss under my breath alot...however, I deal very gently with my co-workers and others as I would never want to hurt anyone...I lament and find many things to be sorrowful about, yet they are non-existant most of the time. What I mean is; I have a good life, things are falling into place for me and I work VERY hard to make things come together, but at times I can just drop into the darkness of my soul and feel very drawn to that place. To augment this I listen to sorrowful music that just caresses my soul at the time, but does no good for getting me out of the funk. What can be very perplexing is that nothing has to trigger the depression most of the time, it is all of a sudden like a black cloud has descended on my soul...I don't know if anyone here has anything to offer, I guess maybe I am just venting or thinking out loud. I will be getting to a Dr. soon, if I can quit procrastinating and find out whom is in my network. Thanks for listening...Deacon Blues
Diagnosed with UC in Dec of 1999
Some left sided scarring from previous disease process
3 Asacol twice daily
This looks like remission!!!
46 yrs old

Veteran Member

Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 3/13/2010 5:48 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Deacon,

The online tests are useful as guidelines, but about as reliable as you'd expect: not so much. You really need a doc to diagnose you. Even some pdocs prefer to wait a while before diagnosing patients because mental health problems are slippery and interrelated. You may not get a diagnosis right away. Let the doctor treat your symptoms, and work on getting better, and the diagnosis will come sooner or later.

Glad you're here,
Co-Moderator, Bipolar and Depression Forums
Bipolar II

"Bipolar disorder can be a great teacher. It's a challenge, but it can set you up to be able to do almost anything else in your life." - CARRIE FISHER

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