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Bohemian
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 58
   Posted 4/2/2010 7:23 AM (GMT -7)   
.

Post Edited (Bohemian) : 6/19/2010 11:25:51 AM (GMT-6)


Kiraz
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2009
Total Posts : 76
   Posted 4/2/2010 3:03 PM (GMT -7)   
I feel you. My mother drilled it into my head that when I was down, I was just being lazy. so now, even when i'm just having a little bit of a bad day, I feel worse because there's a nagging voice in my head that says i'm being lazy and there;s nothing wrong with me and why can;t i get up get the chores done like every other perosn in the world and what the heck is wrong with me!

Then I get days like today when I get so much done but it';s all disorganized that everything at the end of the day is half finished and I'm left with a half clean, haphazard house and I feel horrible that I couldn;t just finish one project cleaning up because i was so distracted that I'll never get anything done. So to balance days like today I end up taking energy pills and tons of coffee to try to finish it, and I spin myself into manic phases that last for only a few days if i'm lucky, but weeks usually where everything gets scoured and i make endless lists and nothing ends up being accomplished in the end because i hyper focus on tasks that should have been so simple.
Diagnosed Bipolar 1995
Successfully Treated now in 2009.
Abilify 2.5mg 1xpm, Seroquel XR 50-100mg PM. Topamax 75mg 2x daily

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