I thought I was leveling out...maybe not

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Not2L8
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 255
   Posted 5/12/2010 4:47 PM (GMT -7)   
I've been nearly tear free (at least not free flowing) for 6 days or so. However I know though stuff isn't over, and although I feel I should more angry or feel something I don't feel a lot about anything. My biggest concern is that I'm falling into old habbits. I crave sex constantly just to feel something. I know this can't be right, right? What's going on?
"Consult not your fears, but your hopes and dreams. Think not about your frustrations, but about your unfulfilled potential. Concern yourself not with what you tried and failed at, but with what is still possible for you to do." You are special and loved!!!!!

Bipolar Disorder
Borderline Personality Disorder
PTSD


tortoise11
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 2896
   Posted 5/12/2010 7:26 PM (GMT -7)   
I think you have completely overwhelmed your mind and it is "giving you a break" by the not feeling anything.
 
Take it as a blessing now.  It is an opportunity.  What do you want to do with it?
Bipolar 2
Borderline Personality Disorder
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
Panic Disorder


Not2L8
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 255
   Posted 5/12/2010 7:47 PM (GMT -7)   
I've just come off a 3 week spiral down, the longest in my adult life also the most I've ever pulled away from everything. I don't know if I can handle a relapse into another one so soon. I don't know what I feel...I just know it's easier to feel nothing. It allows me to function, To put on the show awhile longer.
Also I do see a pdoc once a month and talk doc every week lately.
"Consult not your fears, but your hopes and dreams. Think not about your frustrations, but about your unfulfilled potential. Concern yourself not with what you tried and failed at, but with what is still possible for you to do." You are special and loved!!!!!

Bipolar Disorder
Borderline Personality Disorder
PTSD


horse crazy
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2010
Total Posts : 199
   Posted 5/12/2010 8:22 PM (GMT -7)   
I don't know...sounds to me like you sortt of bottomed out in your past depression, and since the feeligs were probably really intnrse and now you are moving up and you have leveled tken a bit of a break so your brain can rest. (how is that for a run on sentense?) I numb out at times for one of two reasons #1: I have hyst come ouy of a very intnsr period (usually depression) or #2: this is more of a concious decision,,,,I am building walls so no one can hurt ne eniotionally. I hate to say it buy I think most of it is due to being BP, which sucks. Just food for thought
Horse Crazy
Bi-polarII; rapid cycler; Lithium 900 mg; Lamictal 200 mg; seraquel 450mg, klonopin 4mg
 


Not2L8
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 255
   Posted 5/12/2010 8:36 PM (GMT -7)   
feels more like #2. darn.....I'm so tired of rollercoasters.
"Consult not your fears, but your hopes and dreams. Think not about your frustrations, but about your unfulfilled potential. Concern yourself not with what you tried and failed at, but with what is still possible for you to do." You are special and loved!!!!!

Bipolar Disorder
Borderline Personality Disorder
PTSD

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