UPDATE for you all. I went to the doctors again on monday and am now on my second course of antibiots to help get my infection cleared up. I have never had a year like this with infections, GOd this sucks but this is the third one so i am hoping it will be the last.
BTW my BP is in a complete remission right now, weird to have no hypomanias at all or any depression. So this is "normal" huh???? Boy normal people live boring lives
I am absolutly dying to get back on my bike and ride but thats a no go till i get thru this course of "Nuclear weapons grade" antibiotics. (Doctors words not mine)
Still alive and kicking. Almost got this thing beat, but my ears are still a little screwed up. Going back to the doctor on thur if i see no improvemnet by then.
On the down side i've been having realtionship issues that are starting to affect me. Mostly it deals with my wife saying that she has had enough sex in her life and that she never touches, or kisses me, or ever asks for sex/make love. There is allways some excuse, so many that i just dont listen anymore. THis has been hurting me deeply.
That and she seems to have energy for everyone else, (friends, family, work people) but when i come home she heads straight ot bed and has nothing to do with me. When i try to talk about it she blows it off and calls me a baby. I really really amd getting sick of this.
SOrry, needed to vent. thanks for listening.
(((((Hugs))))) I am sorry for these issues. It's so painful isn't it? I know somehow your strength will get you through this. I would suggest that you have a talk together but it sounds like you have tried that....Are you seeing a therpist that might have suggestions that I can't possibly think of?
Sex is something that has been absent with me and bf for months now. I don't have the desire or energy. I think the Mirpex affects my desire for sure. And I don't really feel affectionate towards bf lately either. No cuddling, touching etc. I feel so terrible about it, but I am just so irritable and down.
Anyway, this is about you--just wanted to let you know that although I may be acting like your wife, I have the same feelings you have. I want those connections back.
Do you think it's coming from the stress you were both under being sick etc? I wish I could offer more help but please know you are in my thoughts and if I think of anything more productive, I will post it right away!
More hugs, b/c I know you love them and need them
Thanks Mogs, i'll take all teh hugs i can get. LOL LOL LOL And thanks for sharing, i'm trying to understand whats going on in her mind, so i can better work with her and we both get what we need.
You are a good friend and i appreciate your help. Talking about sex is never easy. I want us to work, so i have sent her a message saying i would like to tlak more about what is bothering us. Maybe if we can get these issues out in the open then we can know what they are. And knowing is half the battle.
Honestly though, i have a feelign in my gut, this is for the last year and a half, that we have just grown into two very different people. No blame assigned, we just see the world completely differently. If that s the case then i would rather stop now then continue to live with someone who i share nothing in common with. Yes it will be a pain in the butt but honestly with a little help i can do it. Mostly i would get my own cheap appartment and get out of the house. Then take the time to get the house in order to sell it and make some money to pay off bills. I am at a place in my life where being alone is no longer scary. If being alone is what needs to happen for me to have peace, then i will accept it and fill the loneliness with hikes, biking, work, reading, music, building models, and other things.
Again, thanks for listening.