Welcome to HW Glad you have arrived here! This is a great place for support.
I am sorry you are dealing with confusion, and many other difficult emotions at this time. I was first diagnosed with depression, panic/generalized anxiety disorder...for about 5 years, and then my diagnosis changed to bipolar type II (the panic/anxiety still present, how lucky! LOL).
When my diagnosis changed, I was unsure at first. When pdoc reviewed my symptoms over the recent years prior to my bp diagnosis, it did make sense, but I was still confused. So I went out and bought a few books on the disorder and read a lot. It was a beginning for me in understanding what I have and what the road ahead meant.
Something I found very helpful in the beginning and to this day: Keep a mood chart, daily. Here is a link for one http://www.bipolar-lives.com/bipolar-mood-chart.html (I use the first chart on the list). This way you know your symptoms from day to day and you can bring it to appointments. I think this could help with the confusion; to keep track of what you are feeling. You can make notes on the back regarding bf, anixiety attacks, stressors...etc. It helps you keep track of what the meds are doing, which is probably the most important part.
I am not too familiar with Borderline ... but I was wondering if you had any other diagnosis before; or this is the first? And are you seeing a psychiatrist?
As far as your boyfriend is concerned, that can be tough. Take things one step at a time and focus on yourself right now until you get your bearings with all of this.
I hope I have helped some,
Take special care of yourself. You are not alone and you can get a grip on this for sure
Bipolar II, Anxiety/Panic Disorder
Clonazepam .5mg as needed, Methoprazine 12 mg/day, Mirapex working up to 2.25 mg/day, Lamictal 400mg/day