I hope she owns this also. FOr me and my wife it had come to blows and she had a corkscrew so i came out the worse on that end. For whatever reason i had a moment of clarity that allowed me to see where blame well and truely lay. WITH ME> So i quickly came to terms with it, embraced it as who and what i am, and have moved forward with my life with this in it.
THe meds started with abilify, which helped a little. Then to respirdal which helped alot (however which scared the hell out of me.) During that time i have had plenty of ups and downs, but all in all with the medications i have had lots more better days than bad.
But it took time to learn to deal with this whole BP thing. THat was what the therpast was for, she helped me greatly. During that time i was also working hard to rebuild my life. The whole thing took alot of work and alot of time. ANd it wasnt any huge ah hah moments that showed i was getting better, just a slow steady progression back to normal.
What im trying to say is that this will take a lot of time and alot of work on both your parts to overcome what has happened. However with love and understanding and a real commitment on both your arts you can make it.
I will find a way or make one. –Phillip Sidney 1554-1586
All that I am and all that I shall ever be, I owe to my Angel Mother.
The Bucket List- Have you found joy in your life? Has your life brought joy to others?
Make sure your suffering has meaning…
I'm also sorry she isnt handling this well, but time will tell if she has what it takes to come out of this. She will say awefull things, just try and let it go if she does. Not for her sake but for yours. No good is ever accomplished by carrying around hurt and pain, it just makes your life that much worse.
I'll keep a good thought for you today, stay strong and hope for the best.
jbauls, i wanted to share with you something that i have been thinking about your situation. Its a few thoughts so please bear with me.
Thought number 1, I have been where you are sir, i know the pain you are going thru. When my wife found out about my multipal affairs she hit the roof (cant say i blame her) She was so upset that she attacked me with a corkscrew and came darn close to my carotid arterly. (bad spelling today, sorry) Of course both of us wanted a divorce right away. We hated each other and blamed each other for what happened. But instead of moving out and burning down the village (so to speak) my wife and i decided to hang together long enough to see if the meds and therpay would have an effect. And over weeks, months, and now years it has. Yesterday i celebrated my birthday with my wife and we had a fantastic day, and i wouldnt have had that had she and i just bailed out and quit right there. It wasnt easy, it was lots of tears, lots of hurt feelings, lots of life changes, and in a way, lots of reinventing who and what i was. But we made it and we did it. And looking back, it was all worth all the effort.
Thought number 2. Two of my jobs are high stress, 100% mistake free or someone gets hurt or loses a life type jobs. Both of these (firefighter and LP Detective) we learn and also teach that sometimes you have to slow way down to do something right. That there are times when speed really does kill. ANd when it is all freaking out, when your world is on fire and everything is about to end, the hardest thing to do is to slow down, and make sure that what you do is the right thing. Sometimes the knee jerk reaction will save your life, often it will get you killed. (in my line of work)
I' m just saying i know you are in a world of hurt right now, and it seems like this pain will never go away. But it does and it will. And you rwife could get better with the meds and treatment. She is going to have to come to grips with this desease just as you are, and her brian isnt exactly working right right now is it? I'm just trying to help you not make a decision that you may regret in a few months or years. We do get better, we can lead normal lives and have normal monogamous relationships. BP isnt an automatic death sentance to her chances of leading a successful and normal life.
Again i will keep you and your family in my thoughts today.