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winnie1
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2010
Total Posts : 31
   Posted 8/9/2010 9:09 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi everyone,
 
Do you ever get tired of trying to manage this disease?  Seems like one minute I am up and one minute I am down.  Sometime it feels like I am on a fence and I can either fall one side or the other.  It is hard for me just to balance myself.  My friend tells me you do not act like you are bipolar.  I tell her it is a everyday struggle to just manage my disease.  If she realy knew how hard I try everyday to "look normal and to act normal" she would be in for a big surprise.

tortoise11
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 2896
   Posted 8/9/2010 9:20 PM (GMT -7)   
Yeah - I get tired of it. And stop taking care of myself. I say I'm "taking a break." And then I have MAJOR issues. :P

I hate the "on the fence" feeling you describe. I feel like I can't do anything without "falling off."
Bipolar 1
Borderline Personality Disorder
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
Panic Disorder
 
"It's never too late to become what you might have been."

happy bill
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 1132
   Posted 8/10/2010 8:33 AM (GMT -7)   

 

  Absolutly, especially since this is something i will deal with till the day i die. Kinda hard not to get tired. ANd frankly you wouldnt be human if you didnt, everything is cyclicial in nature, or like the symbol of Yin and Yang. Just when Yin aproaches its strongest most powerful position, Yang is allready there starting up and taking some of the power from Yin.

  You are tired now, rest, do what you can to minimize the damages that you can cause to yourself and others. Rest some more, release yourself of any guilt you may have for things you have done while  you were tired and down. You cant be on top of this desease 100% of the time all the time. Its completely impossible. Just do the very best you can with what you have each day, and let tommrrow take care of itself. 

   Bill  


 
   "If Life Gives You Lemons, Make Lemonade"
 
   "It isn't my fault that i am BiPolar, It is my responsibility how i treat it so that i don't hurt others or myself."  Happy Bill
 
   Meds. Respirdal  0.5 a day, more if needed.

mogli
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 1191
   Posted 8/10/2010 8:33 AM (GMT -7)   

Oh my gosh. You have just described exactly how I feel right now.

Not only am I beyond fatigued, but yes I am tired of fighting this as well. In fact when I go to my pdoc this week, I am not going to make any med changes b/c that is all I've been doing constantly for over a year and nothing is working. I feel like I am never going to be well.

I too, put on such an act at work and that is draining as well. I do have a lot of stress; my Mom has stage IV lung cancer, so honestly I don't see any light at the end of my tunnel at all.

I want you to know winnie that I am thinking of you (you too Tortoise!) with this awful feeling.

Sending many hugs,

Mogs


Mogs
 
Bipolar II, Anxiety/Panic Disorder
Clonazepam .5mg as needed for panic attacks
---temporarily off Lamictal----
Seroquel 50mg/night

red lightening
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 620
   Posted 8/10/2010 9:07 AM (GMT -7)   
Life's just hard with Bipolar.

mogli
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 1191
   Posted 8/10/2010 10:25 AM (GMT -7)   
Agreed.

Mogs
 
Bipolar II, Anxiety/Panic Disorder
Clonazepam .5mg as needed for panic attacks
---temporarily off Lamictal----
Seroquel 50mg/night
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