Well it is almost a month to the day since i left my wife, and that said things are startign to settle down into a rythmn.
I have had a few "bad days" where i have looked on CL for sex. But nothing came of it as i was able to recover myself after doing it. I kinda hit my own reset button. But since there is no "crime" commited, i count it as a success. Plus with all the stress i've been under i'm not really surprised.
I am cutting back on the 24 hour shifts at base and replacing them with day work at sears and bike shop. I dont sleep at base so it compounds the problem and makes my body worse.
THe good is how right i feel, it is like a weight has been lifted. I am walking thor every night i am off, and him and i have loved that. My wife has settled down and even offered to help pay for some of my stuff she destroyed, that is a huge step there.
ALl in all i am hitting the vitiams hard, trying to eat well, ride more, and stress less. I am in much better shap financially, since i have complete control i am not digging out from her spending issues. I can handle the load, and if she actually gives me money each paycheck i can make even faster progress. But bit by small bit i am creating a new life for myself that feels very good.
"If Life Gives You Lemons, Make Lemonade"
"It isn't my fault that i am BiPolar, It is my responsibility how i treat it so that i don't hurt others or myself." Happy Bill
Meds. Respirdal 0.5 a day, more if needed.