At 1 yr. old I had a deep feeling that something was wrong with my daughter. Many mood swings, hurting herself, night terror, not eating well, hurting others, and believes she is the boss of everyone. I talked to her doctors who mention ADHD and medicating her. I decided against meds and worked with he.
I now have another child who is 13 mo. I am not sure what to do with my oldest (now 3). She has several mood swings that sometimes are set off by nothing.
I.E. today, she woke up at 7am, got into bed with me and I got up at eight. Woke her, told her it was time to eat. Got her dressed (which is a fight on its own), and asked he what she wanted for breakfast. She said chicken. I told her no, cereal or eggs. She said cereal and picked the one she wanted a told me to put milk in it. I said ok and told her to sit down why I make it. Gave her the cereal she started yelling at me that she didn’t want cereal. Told her to eat it or she would have to wait until lunchtime...she tossed the bowl on the floor. It broke. I told her to go to the corner. She started yelling, came over, and kicked me leaving a bruise. I walked away and she started banging her head on the wall for about 10mins. Then stopped, tried to go into her sister's room, but I latched the door. Therefore, she could not get in. She yelled, beatted, and kicked on the door for 30mins. Then she laid in the hallway for 30min screaming and kicking the walls. Next came in my room and started throwing stuff round my room. I took a toy robot from her. She calmed down instantly for 30 seconds, and then started crying as if I hurt her feelings, for about 10min. Then stopped went to the living room to watch TV. 10 min was screaming and kicking on the couch for no reason I could see. This is almost a daily routine.
Two weeks ago I cooked chicken nuggets told her they were very hot to wait for me to bring them to her, when I wasn’t looking she took one brought it to her baby sister, who started screaming. I took the nugget away and asked my three-year-old why she gave her sister a hot nugget She replied "I wanted to burn her."
Later that day she started beating her sister with a hanger. When I took the hanger away, she bit me then started crying as if I hurt her feelings.
I do not know what to do anymore. I feel as if I am failing as a parent. I cannot work because no day care will take her. I spend 2xs the amount of time with her than her sister. Her sister will be starting day care soon because I fear what my 3yr old will do. I keep a steady routine. I cannot leave the house because she is just as bad anywhere else. She will stop in the middle of an isle and start screaming. Also does not want anyone else to come down the isles. If you try to pick her up she will kick and bite. Also I have the baby, I’m trying to hold or watch. No one wants to watch her.
I have tried time outs, locking in room, taking away TV, toys. She is on a very strick diet low sugar, low carbs, I've tried spanking...I think she may be bi polar her father my ex husband is, has been since 5 started medicated treatment 1 year ago.... Is it ok to medicate your child when you feel like you cant handle the child or that the child cant handle themselves??? I made a physiatrist appt last month but its not until April 29, I think I need help now!
ANY ADVISE, PLEASE ?
Pattyclaire, your childhood echoes mine! I was married at 18 after being physically and emotionally abused/neglected always in trouble at school (bored!), into drugs and alchohol, promiscuous, married again at 20, cheated on him after 6 months, then moved to Dallas. More failed relationships, finally got on lithium and decided to put myself through nursing school while living alone on 8$ an hour. Got out with straight A's, went to work and met my husband in '93. Got married a year later and put him through hell, due to quitting my meds in school. 10 years later, serious about meds. Now doing great and he loves it!
Christine, I am concerned about your daughter, I was like that, too, except when I threw a fit, I got beaten, so I tried to keep it in. I started hurting myself becuase I was not allowed to be angry. I remember having night terrors way back when I was 2, my mom said it was almost from birth. I was mean to other kids, couldn't get along with anybody.
I believe there is something very wrong with your daughter. Does she have nightmares? Is she also clingy with you when not throwing a fit? Is she antisocial with other kids?
I do believe she needs to be medicated, she is obviously miserable, poor thing. Even worse for children, they don't understand they may be ill. I believe serious mental illness has definite indications in childhood, it's just that most parents think it's a "stage" or attribute it to just being kids. I would definitely get her help. She is beyond any type of discipline at this point. Keep us posted, OK? Good luck!