Mistee, I am sorry to hear you're having so much trouble - have you seen the doc yet?
Please know this - it CAN and WILL get much better once you get on the right meds. But you need to learn all you can about bipolar disorder, too. It will be partially up to you how well you do. You have to talk to your doc a LOT - phone calls count, too! If you aren't feeling right, don't wait to tell him. don't just trust that he knows everything, because all Bipolars are different, we all have different responses to different meds. Just because one works for some, doesn't mean it will work for you. The more you learn and talk with your doc, the better chance you have at getting well. I really do wish you the best! Ask us anything, we've been there!