Fear of dreaming, unfortunately as long as he is unstable and using drugs/alcohol in any way, his moods will always be priority over you or anything else in life. That's the naked truth about BPs that take whatever medicine, or the wrong one, and use. They are not stable and cannot think clearly past thier mood.
I suggest you really, really, really learn the details of how bad it can be. If he is like this just over the phone, it will be much worse when you see each other regularly, god forbid live together.
I hate to be a doomsayer, but it's reality. BP is for life, and the majority of BPs won't take meds, or they go on and off, so they are constantly manic, hypomanic, or depressed. Paranoia is a common feature too.
I'm not just a nurse, I have suffered it for 25 years, and I have made my family miserable, not to mention no long term relationships due to the horrible treatment of other people, always the closest ones. I am lucky my husband has put up with it for 11 years, he finally said if I didn't get stable, he was going to leave. This man is precious, an angel on this earth, so I finally got medicated and stable. Now, I am that wonderful person he fell in love with and I treat him like a king, never forgetting I have a lot of making up to do. But that was a long wait for him, and anyone else would have left me.
You need to decide if you can live like that. Don't do ANYTHING until he makes it a priority to get stable and STAY that way. BPs are famous for getting better and then going off their meds, it's classic.
This is a wonderful place to ask anything and everything you ever wanted to know about the details of this illness. What you read on the internet barely scratches the surface.
Post Edited (fear_of_dreaming) : 7/12/2005 6:58:05 PM (GMT-6)
I'm not sure I understand. We take medication and over time we get better because of this medication. So we think if we stop taking it we will be ok? What am I missing? I am not hypocritical, maybe just ignorant. Do we forget its the meds that are making us better? Are we fighting accepting that we will never be normal? Or maybe that all the quacks don't know what they are talking about and I'm not bi polar I'm just weak minded.
Why do doctors take them off meds? I don't understand? At some point are we going to get well if we take these long enough? Or is this a lifetime thing and we just learn to cope and live the best we can with the best attitude we can.
Pepperina, bipolar does not ever get better, except when it's controlled with the RIGHT medication you will feel better. It actually gets worse as we get older. You are not weak minded; you have no choice because bipolar is a bain disorder, just like any other organ in the body. It's physical and we have no control, except to be responsible enough to get and STAY medicated. It is the meds that make us feel better, there is no cure, so if you go off, you'll be right back where you were, and many times worse than before.
Not trying to scare you; have seen countless hundreds of bipolar patients go through this over and over, in total denial. I am no exception! I finally did get stable, tho and I wouldn't go back to that hell.
Any doctor that would take a bipolar off meds probably bought his degree!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You NEVER, EVER, EVER take a BP off meds! It's extremely dangerous for the person, and every time you have a manic episode it's harder and harder to stabilize. If your doc even suggested this, GET ANOTHER ONE! Get a psychiatrist, not a GP.
Please do it TODAY! I read another thread that you are having a manic episode. Those episodes can be very dangerous; please get help asap. Keep us posted, OK?