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Arenace
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2005
Total Posts : 249
   Posted 8/15/2005 8:31 AM (GMT -7)   
Hey, is there anyone out there who along with the BP, or maybe because of it, is just plain obsessive. I don't mean turn the light switch a thousand times, I mean just can't let things go?
 
Just wondering....


Bipolar brings new meaning to the "Little Ups And Downs Of Life!!"
 
Sandra


 

Post Edited (Sandra French) : 8/15/2005 9:34:28 AM (GMT-6)


kittycat27
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2005
Total Posts : 438
   Posted 8/15/2005 4:02 PM (GMT -7)   
 Hi haven't met ya yet! I was away. Yeah I have that problem, although I do not call it obsessive.I call it annoying at least to me! lol Anyways, I really dwell on issues and can't seem to get them out of my head even if there was a resolution to the problem. Like things from awhile ago I still find that it irritates me, and I just cannot let it go. See I dwell on things, forever and ever and ever. It's really not healthy. It frustrates me more than anything. I think sometimes that , that is why I can't seem to be able to get stable. Like it holds me back. I also have alot of repressed anger if you will. I like to keep it all in and when I explode I really explode and most of the time it is at the wrong person! eyes   I also check my doors at least four times at night before I go to bed, so I have the other side too. Gosh now that I think about it , I double check alot things. I just thought it was habit. In my eyes it is just a habit, sometimes it is forgetfulness too.lol Welcome to the forum!

Arenace
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2005
Total Posts : 249
   Posted 8/15/2005 5:22 PM (GMT -7)   
I am so glad to know that I am not the only one who does this!! And I so agree with the annoying part. It will play again and again in my head until it drives me nuts! Not like racing thoughts, although I have that too sometimes, but just an idea or an issue or a slight or some darn thing that just won't leave me alone! And yes, I confess, I check the doors and the windows and the water taps, etc. probably a couple of more times than strictly necessary. But heck, better to be safe than sorry, right?
Bipolar brings new meaning to the "Little Ups And Downs Of Life!!"
 
Sandra


 


kittycat27
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2005
Total Posts : 438
   Posted 8/15/2005 6:14 PM (GMT -7)   
  Exactly, it's not being paranoid , I am just being cautious. lol yeah

psychnurse
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 807
   Posted 8/16/2005 6:35 AM (GMT -7)   

Yes!!!!!!!

I don't have any of the repeating behaviour, but the not letting go drives me (and Paul!) crazy.   It was much worse when I was sick, but it's still there.  In fact it happened this weekend.  He has ADD and in spite of meds, it's pretty bad.  He hyperfocuses on whatever he does; esp. TV shows and the computer - he is in his own little world  I sometimes wonder if it's really autism, lol!  Anyway, I get really tired and frustrated because if I interrupt him he doesn't hear me and ignores me, or he snaps at me.  Well, I finally blew this w/e and of course that makes him defensive and he blew too, which totally isn't like him.  We had JUST talked about this an hour before, he esp hates it when I pause a movie, for instance.  We had just snuggled in to watch a movie, and one of our dogs whines for attention all the time, and he was banging his metal bowl on the floor like a ****ing child, as usual and I was pissed, so I paused the movie to pick up the bowl and tell him to be QUIET!  Before I even got out of the chair, he went off!  I explained that I wanted to take care of that so we wouldn't have anymore interruptions but it didn't help, so I got pissed and in his face, he did too and left for about an hour. 

When he came back he was all nice, but I would have NONE of it and told him I wanted a ****ing apology.  He got mad again and said "I'm sorry" in a tone that wasn't sincere, so I stayed mad.  I can NOT let go of something until it is totally resolved.  He on the other hand needs to cool off, so we have a problem, Houston!  After the movie, I got after him and we found that he didn't even hear the dog.  BEcause that's how it is when he hyperfocuses.  I can't STAND other noise, so I freak out!  We argued until he fell asleep from his meds.   Then I brought it up yesterday and we got into it even worse, because he snapped at me when I interrupted him again, only this time it was a commercial!  Goddarn him!  Finally we talked normally and he apologized all over the place.  I just can't be calm!  Why!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Too much adrenaline, I CAN'T!  I got the sincere apology I wanted and he was perfect the rest of the day, we came to an understanding.  It's typical ADD stuff, but I can't stand it nonetheless.

OMG I have rambled so bad!  I'm sorry, it was boring.  It was just an example of how I can't let things go, I think you guys can understand.

Another type of obsession is hobbies.  I literally eat, breathe and dream them 24/7 to where I can think of nothing else.  I am compelled to learn enough to be practically an expert on the subject and do it practically every waking hour.  Like the horse thing.  Work all day, go straight to  the stables, train, ride for a couple of hours practicing (all show stuff, no pleasure), wash horse, cool him down, put him back in stable till tomorrow.  Get home around 10::0 p.m. and do this every day - spend the entire day there on w/e.  Nice, huh.  I didn't have a mariage back then, just a roommate. No sex, separate bedrooms.  4 years of that.  Then the occult and pagan religion. another few years of that.  Then cooking, it's was always something, but not too bad now, medicated and a great marriage thank god. 

Thanks for listening to me ramble!  Oh, and have you noticed I ramble?  mad


kittycat27
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2005
Total Posts : 438
   Posted 8/16/2005 9:15 AM (GMT -7)   
Shannon, sorry you guys had a difference! It is refreshing to know though, I was starting to think you and Paul were like some heavingly perfect couple and that maybe me and Jason have differences too much over stupid s***. I hope that came out right. Anyways, Quit apologizing for rambling, I do it all the time. After I read my stuff back sometimes , I am like what the heck, I am  jabber jaw. I wanted to tell you before and forgot , so before I forget, I am the queen of the horrible F word. Do you what gets me , the fact that men will say , there's nothing worse than a woman saying it. I am like well you just said it , like 4 times in 15 minutes? So it's not lady like, whatever, we are both ( I still consider you to be)  in the professional field, and I always say , i can act however you want me to act, but hen I leave this office, hospital or school, I am me, and me .... uses he F word alot. To me it's just another word, although I do refrain from saying it in front of Jason's mom, she hates that word???? Whatever, I am polite also.             Nick

psychnurse
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 807
   Posted 8/16/2005 9:33 AM (GMT -7)   

LOL, the F word.  It's so versatile.  I find I can pretty much get any point across nicely with that, haha!  But, like you said, there is a time and place.

Oh, god I hope I don't come across like we never have differences!  I still pick little fights sometimes if I'm off.  He usually doesn't, that's just not his nature (thank god, we don't need to both be that way!).  It's just that it's so night and day since I got medicated, I can see how great he is and appreciate it, which I do!  sorry, I'll start reporting our fights now, lol.  (Sarcastic joke!!!, nothing meant by it!)

And, personally I love when people ramble, because it's a long post to read, lol, and we're all so similar I can totally relate to each and every post and person!  We just have lots to say, that's all!  When other people it can be very boring, dontcha think!  *feeling smug* tongue


kittycat27
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2005
Total Posts : 438
   Posted 8/16/2005 1:34 PM (GMT -7)   
 maybe Jason and Paul have something in common, but really I think Jason is sometimes scared of me(repeat not physically). He doesn't like to argue, he never would start an arguement, he pretty much goes along with whatever I want or whatever. It would be awful if I dated someone like myself, arguementative, or too opinionated, or simply had an attitude, that would make me even more batty. Ha ! So I guess it's better that he is more quiet and reserved. Lots of people say , they just can't see me with him, cause I am so loud, and yappy,and there he is. It's rather funny. He is like yeah , that's just Nickie. I am probably just manic, cause really, I am pretty quiet myself sometimes..... NOTICE , I am always thinking though.

psychnurse
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 807
   Posted 8/16/2005 2:03 PM (GMT -7)   

I feel the same way you do - Paul is the only guy I could ever be with; he's not a wuss at all, but he can handle me soooooo well, easygoing, just goes with the flow, not demanding or critical at all.  (I know how well we all do with even "constructive" *cough at same time as saying bullcrap* criticism), LOL!

I'm quiet when I'm depressed, chatty cathy when I'm up.  Oh, well, we aren't boring! yeah


kittycat27
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2005
Total Posts : 438
   Posted 8/16/2005 3:26 PM (GMT -7)   
Or predictable, well me cause I haven't bumped into stable yet! When I do, I am gonna say what the f*** took so long? ha ha ha ........ I have some other things to say too.

psychnurse
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 807
   Posted 8/16/2005 3:58 PM (GMT -7)   

Oh, don't worry about stable being boring.  I still have the unpredictable moods, too!  :-)

Oh, Jason will probably say the same thing about the time it took, lol.

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