Post Edited (Sandra French) : 8/15/2005 9:34:28 AM (GMT-6)
I don't have any of the repeating behaviour, but the not letting go drives me (and Paul!) crazy. It was much worse when I was sick, but it's still there. In fact it happened this weekend. He has ADD and in spite of meds, it's pretty bad. He hyperfocuses on whatever he does; esp. TV shows and the computer - he is in his own little world I sometimes wonder if it's really autism, lol! Anyway, I get really tired and frustrated because if I interrupt him he doesn't hear me and ignores me, or he snaps at me. Well, I finally blew this w/e and of course that makes him defensive and he blew too, which totally isn't like him. We had JUST talked about this an hour before, he esp hates it when I pause a movie, for instance. We had just snuggled in to watch a movie, and one of our dogs whines for attention all the time, and he was banging his metal bowl on the floor like a ****ing child, as usual and I was pissed, so I paused the movie to pick up the bowl and tell him to be QUIET! Before I even got out of the chair, he went off! I explained that I wanted to take care of that so we wouldn't have anymore interruptions but it didn't help, so I got pissed and in his face, he did too and left for about an hour.
When he came back he was all nice, but I would have NONE of it and told him I wanted a ****ing apology. He got mad again and said "I'm sorry" in a tone that wasn't sincere, so I stayed mad. I can NOT let go of something until it is totally resolved. He on the other hand needs to cool off, so we have a problem, Houston! After the movie, I got after him and we found that he didn't even hear the dog. BEcause that's how it is when he hyperfocuses. I can't STAND other noise, so I freak out! We argued until he fell asleep from his meds. Then I brought it up yesterday and we got into it even worse, because he snapped at me when I interrupted him again, only this time it was a commercial! Goddarn him! Finally we talked normally and he apologized all over the place. I just can't be calm! Why!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Too much adrenaline, I CAN'T! I got the sincere apology I wanted and he was perfect the rest of the day, we came to an understanding. It's typical ADD stuff, but I can't stand it nonetheless.
OMG I have rambled so bad! I'm sorry, it was boring. It was just an example of how I can't let things go, I think you guys can understand.
Another type of obsession is hobbies. I literally eat, breathe and dream them 24/7 to where I can think of nothing else. I am compelled to learn enough to be practically an expert on the subject and do it practically every waking hour. Like the horse thing. Work all day, go straight to the stables, train, ride for a couple of hours practicing (all show stuff, no pleasure), wash horse, cool him down, put him back in stable till tomorrow. Get home around 10::0 p.m. and do this every day - spend the entire day there on w/e. Nice, huh. I didn't have a mariage back then, just a roommate. No sex, separate bedrooms. 4 years of that. Then the occult and pagan religion. another few years of that. Then cooking, it's was always something, but not too bad now, medicated and a great marriage thank god.
Thanks for listening to me ramble! Oh, and have you noticed I ramble?
LOL, the F word. It's so versatile. I find I can pretty much get any point across nicely with that, haha! But, like you said, there is a time and place.
Oh, god I hope I don't come across like we never have differences! I still pick little fights sometimes if I'm off. He usually doesn't, that's just not his nature (thank god, we don't need to both be that way!). It's just that it's so night and day since I got medicated, I can see how great he is and appreciate it, which I do! sorry, I'll start reporting our fights now, lol. (Sarcastic joke!!!, nothing meant by it!)
And, personally I love when people ramble, because it's a long post to read, lol, and we're all so similar I can totally relate to each and every post and person! We just have lots to say, that's all! When other people it can be very boring, dontcha think! *feeling smug*
I feel the same way you do - Paul is the only guy I could ever be with; he's not a wuss at all, but he can handle me soooooo well, easygoing, just goes with the flow, not demanding or critical at all. (I know how well we all do with even "constructive" *cough at same time as saying bullcrap* criticism), LOL!
I'm quiet when I'm depressed, chatty cathy when I'm up. Oh, well, we aren't boring!
Oh, don't worry about stable being boring. I still have the unpredictable moods, too!
Oh, Jason will probably say the same thing about the time it took, lol.