Being bp2 & a christion is hard!

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melmac
New Member


Date Joined Feb 2006
Total Posts : 17
   Posted 2/25/2006 5:19 AM (GMT -7)   
nono  hi my name is melisa.                                                                         I strugle a lot on making good choises. some times i know i am not in the right fram of mind to make good dissons other times i am not awheir. sory my spellin is bad! is their anyone that can give me advice? sum times I feel devil   but I know it is wrong. its hard to make good choises when you are all  mested up inside.              

els
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2005
Total Posts : 4031
   Posted 2/25/2006 7:12 AM (GMT -7)   

Hi Melisa,

Welcome to Healing Well forum.  We are glad to have you and will try to help in any way possible. 

There are a lot of people that have Bipolar Disorder that struggle with decision making.  Impulse control is a huge factor in this.  If you are getting treatment and taking medications for it than you should be able to see some of this level off.  It is hard to give advice without more specific details on what you are going through. 


~elisha
 


melmac
New Member


Date Joined Feb 2006
Total Posts : 17
   Posted 2/26/2006 1:10 AM (GMT -7)   
Thank you for repling! I am on my 5th day on lamictal. The Pdoc has tried me on 3 other medicens but they didn't work. Sence I first got married (12-05-1997) I was in a car actsident (12-31-1997) after I recoverd I got pregnet(litte girl). Three or three&half years later my son (from a prier marrige) 12 years old at the time molested my daugter. Sence then he has received treatment. In Agust of last year I went to a new Pdocter. Sortly after is when he told me I was bipoler2. Now I look back I see I was showing signs of bipoler sortly after my car actsident. The docters I had befor first said I had postpardem blues then I was told I had major deperestion. Iwas so doped up I wasn't there for my kids like a mom is suppot to be. I went off all meds I new the risk but I thought it was werth the risk. I wanted to be a mom to my kids again. My son has only talked to me once sence he has been out of treatment. I just did get every thing taken care of ,regarding the bankrupsy we just went through. Know I am scedguald for sergery on my right shoulder (to clean up all of the bursideis)on thursday 3-2-06. melisa

els
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2005
Total Posts : 4031
   Posted 2/26/2006 6:44 AM (GMT -7)   
That is quite a lot to go through.  I am glad that you are trying medications again as you cant control bipolar disorder on your own.  I think that you will find that eventually after you get adjusted to your new medications (hopefully they will work for you) that your quality of life will be so much better.  Much like us that have depression and finally get on medications for it, you kinda of wonder what took me so long to do it.  You know what I mean?  Your son may be angry with you for putting him in treatment but know that you protected your daughter that is the number one thing.  That situation must of been so difficult for you.  Hopefully he will put aside his anger and realize that.  Good luck to you on your surgery.  My thoughts are with you. 
~elisha
 


melmac
New Member


Date Joined Feb 2006
Total Posts : 17
   Posted 2/26/2006 5:40 PM (GMT -7)   
:-)  Thank you for your reply! It is dificult. I love my son. The thing is the courts are the ones that put him there. I felt it was best for him anyway. He probely is angery at me. You know God did teache me something through this though. (I as a child had been molested many times by differint people & was raped by my ex husband. I said to my self if that ever happened to my childeren I would KILL that person! When it was my son. I relized I couldn't do that becase I love him! ) God teached me that we are all related through him & if I can't hurt my own flesh and blood then I can't hurt my brother or sisters in christ.                Thank you for your best wishes on the surgery!
 
                                             GOD Bless YOU!
                                               
                                                                 Melisa

melmac
New Member


Date Joined Feb 2006
Total Posts : 17
   Posted 2/28/2006 4:14 AM (GMT -7)   
I don't know what to say or how to say it ,because every thing is conneted, every thing is black or white. I feel that every thing is coneted. we are mently ill or not. we are physicly healthy or not. we believe in --- or ---s. Its hard to talk about one whith out talking about the other!
The only thing that is not black or white is how we react to things in are life. The things in my have dron me closer to the one I love.
Its hard to talk to people about what they don't know or understand.

els
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2005
Total Posts : 4031
   Posted 2/28/2006 7:34 AM (GMT -7)   

Melisa,  When you say that "it is hard to talk to people about what they don't know or understand" I wonder why this should make a difference to you.  Everyone has been through something.  I was molested by my stepfather from ages 3 to 11.  I work with people that have mental illnesses and even child molesters.  I may not understand what is going on in their head and it may anger me (just the child in me) but I can still try to relate to them as a person. 

All of us can relate as people and human beings. 

Maybe I am not understanding what you are trying to say here.  sad


~elisha
 


melmac
New Member


Date Joined Feb 2006
Total Posts : 17
   Posted 3/1/2006 4:29 AM (GMT -7)   
I mean mind, body,& soul.
I know every one has been through something. I am as nice as I can be to everyone. What I ment was(I bleive in god) its hard to talk to people that don't relize that they are coneted or exsept it. I don't juge anyone . I is hard to talk to people about things in my life , without talking about the other. I hope you under stand now.

Post Edited By Moderator (Putter) : 3/1/2006 7:00:38 AM (GMT-7)

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