Wow! It is great to realize that someone if feeling the exact same way that I am. I have read several of your posts and you describe the way I am feeling right now perfectly! From what I have researched I did not know if it was possible to experience symptoms of depression and mania at the same time...besides in the "mixed' state. For the past month I have felt extremely depressed with all of the symptoms from crying uncontrollably to guilt to suicidal thoughts...but I also have had my moods switch from day to day and I become extremely energized. Just a few days ago I was crying alot and talking about how I hated myself and life and then a few hours later it seems I was going through a stage of mania. I was totally and uncontrollably fidgety, laughing, and moving for a period of two hours straight. I was kicking my lecks non-stop, talking, laughing, making stupid noises and stupid comments. I even felt like and threatned to take off all of my clothes even though I was in front of my husband and his friend which is something I would NEVER do! As I was doing this, I was sitting on the couch and kicking my legs. My husband sat in between my legs on the floor hoping that it would stop my kicking, but I continued to...even kicking him in the side of his head! That same morning I was depressed, sad, and hated everything...and later that evening couldn't stop moving or calm my brain down. How can moods switch so quickly?
As far as a diagnosis for Bipolar Disorder...I took the Mood Disorder Questionare given to me by my University Counselor and was told that it seemed I was high risk for having bipolar disorder. Stupid me waited through a year of painful emotional episodes until now when I am FINALLY seeking help. I have researched Bipolar Disorder thouroughly and the symptoms fit me exactly! My dad was diagnosed with ADHD when he was a child and I have found out that ADHD can sometimes be a misdiagnosis for Bipolar Disorder. My dad's moods has always varied extremely...from being very easy going and non-chalant to being extremely aggressive, hyper, and angry. My mother and I have encouraged him to get help and he denies anything is wrong.
My emotions have became so crazy lately that I quit my job that I absoultely loved when I only had it for three weeks! I quit because my emotions have became so out of control that if I went to work I would have done nothing besides sit at my desk and cry all day. Quiting my wonderful job was a major wake up call to me. I went to my medical doctor first to explain how I was feeling, what my counselor said a year ago and to see if there were any physical causes. He said that just from what I told him alone that it sounded like it was characteristic for Bipolar Disorder and sat me up an appointment with a Psychiatrist. I go to speak with the Psych tomorrow afternoon. In the mean time he completed blood work and tested several things including my thyroid to see if hormones were out of balance. My blood tests were fine so that leaves it to my appointment tomorrow. Do you or anyone else have advice for me on what I am experiencing and does this sound like I am Bipolar?