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Date Joined Aug 2005
Total Posts : 285
Posted 10/18/2006 9:24 AM (GMT -7)
I need some help in working out if this is mania or if I could have OCD on top of bp. If it's normal mania behaviour
, then I'll just assume it'll pass when my medication is increased and all the mania symptoms go.
I get obsessions.
They can be about
Characters in a story, people, equations, books, anything.
Quite often I'll spend days or weeks just spending tons of time researching, or thinking about
only that thing.
It becomes the most important thing ever to me.
So, for example, when I was about
14, I read A Brief History of Time by Stephen Hawkings, and then I spent a month or so working on a theory I'd come up with and having the deluded problems of thinking I was a genius and wondering how no one had thought of this theory before.
I obsessed about
With people it's rare, but can be odd. It's more normally a character in a story; I'll find that character's personal story compelling, and I'll then become a stupid 'fangirl' of that character for ages and write fanfiction and stuff.
It happens more with characters probably because I tend to prefer not to deal with real people to be honest - I'm still a bit of a loner, besides, I love Rob, and I don't even look at other men normally.
The only times I've ever had it with a real man is when they're really energetic and that energy clicks with me when I'm manic, and I'll get really excited about
what they're talking about
, and then I'll obsess about
them for a while. Though obviously I try to push real people out of my mind as quickly as possible.
It's something I'm worried about
now I'm at uni though; I'm worried I'll get hung up on some stupid theory or something and spend all my time researching that when I should be studying my real work!
Is this a mania thing?
Or am I more nuts than I thought?
Thoracic Outlet Syndrome from birth - Diagnosed 1999
Fibromyalgia from birth - Diagnosed 2005
(?) Ulcerative Colitis - waiting for tests
(?) BiPolar - Diazepam short term, and Sodium Valproate (Epilim)
Starting to really get somewhere with the doctors!
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Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 1529
Posted 10/18/2006 2:38 PM (GMT -7)
Don't worry hun -- I don't think any of this is out of the ordinary for bipolar (ain't that the great things about
this condition?!). The delusions of grandeur thing (like with your new Hawkings-related theory) and the obsession with certain men, in particular, are things that I know crop up in descript
ions of bp symptoms over and again.
I think this sort of this is related to the mania, but it's maybe not quite as clear as that it's absolutely a "part" of it, because I've read stuff where it says that you start with mood stabilisers to help with manic states, and then bring in treatment fro depression, attention, obsession, etc. In any case, this should be something that your treatment comes round to addressing and that you can get non-med therapy with as well. I know that this will be worrying you particularly now with uni starting, but remember that the plus side is that you are in a system that has many ways of helping you now (and I mean the uni, but do remember us here too!). Just reach out to it when you need it and make sure that your doc knows about
all of these symptoms and works with you through them.
Why don't you tell a tutor that you like about
this possibility and maybe make an arrangement that you will check in with them once a week or so to discuss what you're working on and make sure that you're staying on track?
Lovely to hear from you as ever lil' hun!
People are not like fish: they do not work well battered.
When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded...
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