I went into a manic phase on halloween and spent around $300. May not sound like a lot, but it is to me and my family. Then when I got them all home, I unpackaged everything so there was no chance of them being returnable. It was all just stuff. I bought me a Cabbage Patch Doll whose name is Michelle Lizette, she has blond hair and green eyes. I bought a bunch of CD's and DVD's etc. We'll get back to the doll in a minute. Anyway, I'm sitting in my living room with all these packages around me and I start crying, hard. There was a big booming voice saying "just do it, just do it, no one cares anyway." Then there was a very small, faint voice that I could hardly hear saying, "no, call your therapist." I listened to the small voice. I called my therapist. He asked if he could send the cops over, "What the hell, won't make anything worse, do it." So in come 4 cops, one a lady. They were very nice. They made me wear handcuffs because it's for insurance, if we got in a wreck blah, blah, blah. Left big bruises. Oh well, she was really nice. And off to the ER I go. After several hours of evaluations etc, they shipped me to UNI, University Neuropathic Institute. They get people from everywhere. Met people from No. Carolina, Texas, Louisiana, Colorado, and Tennessee. They were really good. Had work shops almost all day long. The doctor rearranged most of my meds and i'm feeling a little better, not much. My beautiful husband has been through the ringer. He didn't eat or sleep while I was gone, too worried he said. Anyway, he's been home all week and is staying home tomorrow. I just don't trust myself to be alone. I'm scared. He needs his job, but I'm scared. I can go to my parents during the week and be ok. But when will I be ok by myself? I'm terrified. Anyone have an answers?
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference."
DX: ankylosing spondylitis, periferal neuropathy, chronic migraines/headaches, depression/panic attacks, bi-polar, hypothyroidism, hypoglycemia, orthostatic hypotension, sleep apnea
RX: synthroid, estradiol, cymbalta, geodon, lamictal, inderal la, klonopin, seroquel, tofranil pm, aspirin, relpax, phenergan, esgic plus
Surgeries: hysterectomy 1997, tonsillectomy 2001, deviated septum 2005, cataracts (both eyes) 2006