What is the most obscure thing that you have done in a manic state?

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Rocky Raccoon
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2007
Total Posts : 23
   Posted 10/30/2007 12:34 AM (GMT -7)   
Hello all!
 
My name is Joseph and I am 26 years old and reside in Northern California.  I am starting to have troubles once again with the depression side of the spectrum.  I was diagnosed with BPD when I was about eighteen years old.  I realize that this anxiety, nervousness and paranoia won't disapear this minute, but the cynic in me thought that it would be fun and entertaining to kinly ask all of you to share some of the most obscure things that you have done in a manic state.
 
Like you all, I have done some whacky stuff.  Out of all, I would say that the weirdest thing that I did was spent six months straight writing a play.  I rewrote that thing twenty times until I was 100% satisfied.  I went through the steps to make sure that I got it copyrighted and published--even found myself an agent that would help me get it sold (if anyone would actually by it).  He felt that what I wrote was very disturbing but people would probably like it.  I felt really good about what I had done but that didn't last long.  I told him to pull away from the notion that I want to actually do that and haven't even mentioned a word of it yet.  It is just sitting on my older computer that isn't even connected to the internet.
 
I also once got sick of my life that I was having in the bay area.  I saved up all of my money for two months and hitch hiked to Mexico.  I decided that I was going to live there.  I stayed in Rosarita at first before speaking to my aunt who runs an eco-resort in Tulum, Quintana Roo and she gave me a job basically carrying "guests" as opposed to customers bags to their room.  I was actually making the best money that I have ever made in my life.  I eventually started to grow really paranoid that everyone talking in languages that I didn't understand where saying really bad things about me and were plotting to have me fired and or arrested.  I don't even think that I was doing anything to cause me to be in such a paranoid state.  I felt that I had to get out of the country before I got in some major trouble.  I then went to go live with my mom and dad for the first time in many years as my Aunt said that I seemed as if I was a wreck.
 
Really makes you wonder what psychiatric conditions enlightend thinkers in the past had when someone like me will do some things that are quite out there.
 
Have a good day, all!
 
Insanity:  Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.


serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 10/30/2007 7:02 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Joseph,

Welcome to the board, it's really good to have you. We're glad you found us.

Thanks for telling us a little bit about yourself. Have you ever read "Touched by Fire" by Kay Redfield Jamison? It's about genius and bipolar. If not, you should. She argues that many of the great thinkers and creative minds were bipolar and used their moods to help create. Clearly you've taken advantage of that as well. I'm a writer as well, but only BPII, so no real mania for me. I've never been able to channel the massive energy of mania into a work of art. You should wait until the depression passes, dust off your play, and try to get it produced locally, just to get it tried out. Talk about an ego boost. Keep it safe until then, lest you do something stupid. Writing a play is not a small accomplishment.

Thanks again for joining us. You've already added some interesting things for us to think about.
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum

It is a melancholy of mine own, compounded of many simples, extracted from many objects, and indeed the sundry contemplation of my travels, in which my often rumination wraps me in a most humorous sadness. -- William Shakespeare

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