New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
[ << Previous Thread | Next Thread >> ]

serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 11/5/2007 9:49 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi guys,

I just wanted to let you know where I've been and where I'll be for a few days. I'm here lurking, but my hypomania is getting less hypo and I'm struggling. I can hardly concentrate enough to read through all the posts. So I'm here, I read through every day and try to comment, but if I'm not as chatty as usual, just know I'm okay.

I see my doc on Thursday. I know she'll do the med shuffle on me (I hope!) and we'll get this taken care of. I feel like I'm eating Ativan like candy just to get through the day. My limbs are twitchy, I'm aphasiac, I can't complete sentences, and I can't write or read. So forgive me. I'm here, just quieter than normal.

All you all take care while I'm not well enough to pat backs and write (((hugs))), okay?!

serafena
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum

It is a melancholy of mine own, compounded of many simples, extracted from many objects, and indeed the sundry contemplation of my travels, in which my often rumination wraps me in a most humorous sadness. -- William Shakespeare


olivia of course
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 1523
   Posted 11/5/2007 11:37 PM (GMT -7)   

Serafena,

I am sorry that you are still dealing with your hypomania, I hope it gets better soon.  I know it is a tough place to be.  Hang in there and get better soon.  We miss you on the board!  You know where we are if you need us.


loving frustrated wife
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 865
   Posted 11/5/2007 11:46 PM (GMT -7)   
Serafena, BREATHE...YOGA...BUBBLE BATH...SOOTHING TEA....JOURNAL....WATCH A COMEDY...and don't feel like you have to talk. We feel your presence and only wish you comfort and wellness. Thursday will be here in no time. Until then, keep all communication here and there to minimal easy 1,2,3 words, if at all. Don't worry about asking more of yourself. Save it for those present in your life that need you...like your husband and kids. BREATHE. I know how stress can cause you to forget to do that simple thing...BREATHE. I currently have been reminding myself of it as well. Hubby is being a bit of a bear at the moment and very difficult to live with the last few days. But, this too shall pass and tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes from any of us. Hang in there my dear. We're here if YOU need us! <<<<<<HUGS>>>>>>> to you...LFW

serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 11/6/2007 6:55 AM (GMT -7)   
Thanks guys. Hugs right back.
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum

It is a melancholy of mine own, compounded of many simples, extracted from many objects, and indeed the sundry contemplation of my travels, in which my often rumination wraps me in a most humorous sadness. -- William Shakespeare


wen4003
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 1193
   Posted 11/6/2007 7:12 AM (GMT -7)   
Serafina,
 
I am so sorry that you are going through this and not feeling so well.  But do whatever you have to do to take care of yourself until your appointment.  LFW said it very well and had some great ideas for you to help you relax.  We all know that you know to do those things, but as LFW said, sometimes we just need reminders to do them.  Take care of you.
 
We know you're here with us, so please don't feel as though you have to say anything.  You're a great support to us, now it's our turn to support you and that's exactly what we will be doing.  We love you and care about you. 
 
Gentle and loving (((HUGS))) come your way and you will be in my thoughts and prayers.  If you feel up to it, please let us know how the doctor appointment goes.
 
Wen
 
 
Agoraphobia, Barrett's Esophagus, Bipolar Disorder, Depression, Fibromyalgia, Mitral Valve Prolapse, Panic/Anxiety Disorders, Restless Leg Syndrome, Severe Acid Reflux, Sleep Apnea, Social Anxiety and PTSD
 
Meds: Ambien CR, Ativan, Celexa, Flexeril, Lamictal, Neurontin, Nexium, Requip, Ritalin ER
 

A slip of the foot you may soon recover,

but a slip of the tongue you may never get over.

Benjamin Franklin

 


sukay
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 1432
   Posted 11/6/2007 7:14 AM (GMT -7)   

Hi Serafena,

Sorry to hear how you have been feeling. Wasn't ambilify just recently added to your cocktail? Let us know what happens Thursday.

In the meantime, don't worry about us here. Right now you need to take care of yourself! Can you force yourself to go outside and take a little walk? Maybe take a drive to a nearby mall or some shops and just do some browsing? This is the time I like to go into stores that are unusual or to go into sections of the stores I normally wouldn't go into, just to browse and kill some time.

Well, when I think of something else that might help, I will post it.

((((Hugs))))

~Sukay~
 
Crohns Disease-Remicade since 1999, Methotrexate
Fibromyalgia & Arthritis
Bipolar & Panic/Anxiety-Trileptal, Xanax, Trazadone, Wellbutrin


Casem
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 187
   Posted 11/6/2007 7:17 AM (GMT -7)   
Serafena,
(((((HUGS))))) to you......We are thinking of you. Stay strong and just keep breathing......
 
Casem
 


Djonma
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2005
Total Posts : 285
   Posted 11/6/2007 1:28 PM (GMT -7)   
Hope you get better soon! It's horrible when things go out of whack :-(
*hugs*
Hypermobility
BiPolar
Thoracic Outlet Syndrome
Fibromyalgia
Thrombocytosis
Dyspraxia
IBS
Asthma


serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 11/9/2007 8:20 PM (GMT -7)   
I'm still here everyone, but still in the zone, still playing musical medication. Currently Effexor is out and Topomax is on the rise. I don't even care anymore what she does. I just nod while she fills out the papers. "Sure doc, Whatever." I told her I was beginning to ideate, and she understood, and i can't get around the mountain of guilt I'm dragging with me. Nothing feels good. I go to work and I'm mostly effective, but I'm not doing my best because I'm sleepy and only partially there. I stay at home and I'm jumping out of my skin, my legs and hands literally twitching. I can't stand to just BE with my family. I wanna be anywhere else, but that hasn't been an option because the baby's had chicken pox. It's been nightmarish and I feel like the worst mother and wife in the world. I'm triggering to cut again, and I told the doc I just want out. She said if I'm not doing better by Monday I need to go to the hospital. Yikes! So keep your fingers crossed this new cocktail takes hold and we'll get some clarity before then, because that's a whole lot of group therapy, and I don't know if I can take it.
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum

It is a melancholy of mine own, compounded of many simples, extracted from many objects, and indeed the sundry contemplation of my travels, in which my often rumination wraps me in a most humorous sadness. -- William Shakespeare


loving frustrated wife
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 865
   Posted 11/9/2007 9:17 PM (GMT -7)   
Serafena, NO CUTTING regardless how much you want to! Rational mind needs to take over and MANUALLY override ANY impulse you have like that. What would you say if it were YOUR daughter doing that???? You'd flip and beg her to stop at all cost...so you must adhere to the same. Next, BREATHE...KEEP BREATHING....and if you need to go to the hospital, you WILL handle it because you are big enough, strong enough and gosh darn it....WE ALL LOVE YOU! And I totally get feeling trapped in your own skin with no way out. Between the paralysis last year, and the fibromyalgia...I have had my physical moments where I just wanted to escape myself, but as you know, couldn't for the obvious reasons...so this is what I did... I got a 1 hours reflexology foot message, as no one could touch my back as I was braced up and not really mobile (and I only felt it fully on one foot/leg...but hey...I felt it), then I rented a whole bunch of the movies I had been wanting to see (as at these moments I must rest a lot and let my body and mind shut down). Then to be with my family, I ordered my favorite sushi and had my husband pick it up and we ALL had a home picnic and watched one of the family movies I had always wanted to see at the end of the day. No one could talk much because A) we were watching the movie, B) no one was jumping around because of "A", and C) after the movie, it was bedtime for the kids. So I had all the benefit of cuddles and love, without all the high stimulation - which I couldn't handle at the time physically. (BTW, I am sorry to hear your little one has the chicken pox...that feels miserable). Lastly, don't focus on what you are NOT accomplishing...but on what you are, and be proud of that....be realistic...you COULD be a whimpering mass sitting in the corner unable to move...BUT...you are not, you ARE functioning (albeit, not having fun about it at the moment), and you ARE getting out there in the world and doing what is expected of you in spite of how you feel...therefore...give yourself a BREAK!!!!!!!!!!! Force yourself to focus on all the good you ARE doing. HUGS to you....LFW

sukay
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 1432
   Posted 11/10/2007 6:45 AM (GMT -7)   
Hello Serafena,
 
Oh man, I'm really sorry to hear that you are going through all of this. LFW shared some good tips on ideas for a less stressful weekend. I hope that you are able to try it and that it works out well for you. I hope your new cocktail helps and keeps you out of the hospital.
 
You'll be in my thoughts!
~Sukay~
 
Crohns Disease-Remicade since 1999, Methotrexate
Fibromyalgia & Arthritis
Bipolar & Panic/Anxiety-Trileptal, Xanax, Trazadone, Wellbutrin


olivia of course
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 1523
   Posted 11/10/2007 2:15 PM (GMT -7)   
Oh, Serafena,

I am so sorry you feel so bad. I hope you take LFW's tips on relaxation, and that would help a lot. As Sukay said, I hope your new meds help you a great deal also, so you don't have to go to the dreaded hospital. Hang in there!
Olivia
Co-Moderator, Bipolar
 
Support HealingWell:  http://www.healingwell.com/donate
"Good judgement comes from experience and alot of that comes from bad judgement."


serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 11/10/2007 8:17 PM (GMT -7)   
LFW:

Thank you. You make me cry. I promise no cutting. My husband made me promise too. I will get through this, I will I will I will.

My in-laws have come up for the weekend to try and help us out just for a couple of days. We just need the distraction and the support. They're great with our daughter and love to be with her, naturally, so it helps to have their presence. We're otherwise pretty alone up here... And I'm a bit scared, despite trying to put on a brave face.


Thanks for your kind words everyone.
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum

It is a melancholy of mine own, compounded of many simples, extracted from many objects, and indeed the sundry contemplation of my travels, in which my often rumination wraps me in a most humorous sadness. -- William Shakespeare


loving frustrated wife
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 865
   Posted 11/10/2007 9:50 PM (GMT -7)   
Serafena, fear is fine as long as you keep your rational mind working at all times along with it. Otherwise, fear can propell all kinds of havoc if you give it too much power. You are a smart cookie...just DON"T. And yes...YOU WILL, YOU WILL, YOU WILL...be okay. Hang in there and make an agreement with your husband and in-laws that if the stimulation around you with all present (at NO fault of anyones - just where you are with your chemical imbalance at the moment), you can slip out and quietly go rest in your room away from everyone (read a book, watch tv...whatever)...and NO ONE will be offended. And I am glad you have made me this promise to not cut. I AM GOING TO HOLD YOU TO IT WITH YOUR INTEGRITY AND HONOR! You are a strong and gutsy gal...those are some of the positive gifts you will pass on to your daughter as a woman and her mother. Be VERY proud of yourself for that, and so much more...LFW

sukay
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 1432
   Posted 11/11/2007 5:58 AM (GMT -7)   
Serafena,
 
I hope things are a little better. How nice of your in-laws to come up and help you out for a few days! I hope your daughter feels better too. Keep hangin on Serafena, we all want you to come through all of this. I  hope things start to ease for you.
~Sukay~
 
Crohns Disease-Remicade since 1999, Methotrexate
Fibromyalgia & Arthritis
Bipolar & Panic/Anxiety-Trileptal, Xanax, Trazadone, Wellbutrin

New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
Forum Information
Currently it is Friday, December 09, 2016 11:58 PM (GMT -7)
There are a total of 2,735,766 posts in 301,329 threads.
View Active Threads


Who's Online
This forum has 151433 registered members. Please welcome our newest member, teenujohn.
173 Guest(s), 4 Registered Member(s) are currently online.  Details
0311, msOuchie, joavila92, Randy Eichner


Follow HealingWell.com on Facebook  Follow HealingWell.com on Twitter  Follow HealingWell.com on Pinterest
Advertisement
Advertisement

©1996-2016 HealingWell.com LLC  All rights reserved.

Advertise | Privacy Policy & Disclaimer