Welcome to the HW family and the Bipolar Forum. There are a lot of people here who have gone through similar experiences as you, who can help you. I am glad you were able to find us.
Sounds like you are going through a very rough time with your wife. Your situation is especially hard because your daughter is involved, and your wife keeps getting on and off meds. Mania is a tough thing to deal with, unfortunatly I am usually the one who is manic and never dealt with the other side. But I have heard story, after story about how devastating it can be. I can tell you that mania can get out of control, and the person can lose touch with reality especially if they are having delusions and or hallucinations.
You are in a good place here, keep posting and Hang on.