New Member: Veryworried.Help

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olivia of course
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 1523
   Posted 11/17/2007 12:50 PM (GMT -7)   
I have been with my boyfriend for three years and he talks about getting married all the time. I had always though there was something wrong because of the ways he acted sometimes, he would leave and not come back for days, he would say my car was his and would refuse to give it to me, he would get mad at me and cause me trouble at my job, he is always thinking that Im doing him wrong with someone else, he used to take my money even if he knew we needed, we would get into big fights and he would get very controlling more when he was drunk all this to the point that I had to call the police on him on Oct 19th of last year. He was lucked up for 6 months and sweared up and down he was going to change which he did. He did have anger outburst but not as often as before and he was staying home all the time. We would go to family parties and stuff but then he started drinking at this parties and his anger outburst became more frequent and he wouldnt stop drinking during the weekend and if I would ask him to stop or I would refuse to give him more money he would cause a big scene no matter who was around so we stopped going over there till this past weekend. We went and everything was fine but he started drinking and at the same time we had to go to the hospital because my causing was going o have a baby well long story short he was acting very happy and talkative and clowning around with the nurses and the baby father but he wouldnt stop clowing so it started irritating everyone till the babys father asked him to stop and my boyfriend just got furious to the point that he was causing and talking all kinds of stuff to this guy infront of everyone. We finally left and when we wnt outside he started hitting the wall and the dumpster and he even broke his nuckles he was very drunk too. It embarresed me so much. We went to try to sleep at my aunts room and he would let me sleep he started calling me names and stuff until I had to have sex with him. I was scared because there was no lock and I didnt want nobody to see us but my aunt did walk in on us. He always gets his way even if I dont want to because Im just scared he is going to act stupid. Well after he slept for a long time we went to eat at my causins house and we were ok but he was very talkative again and was frustrating us but we didnt say nothing. He said he was going to the store and he didnt come back again till Tuesday. He spent lots of money from the card, he left me stranded because he took my car keys and no one went to work or school because my car was in the way. He had his whole family tell me that he had gone out of town cause his mother was sick which was not true and he just knew I was going to be mad. Im scared and I dont want this no more but I started reaserching because when he came back I told him I didnt love him no more and he confessed to me that he is mad at himself because he forgets simple things at times and that he cant understand some things or concentrate. He has never been able to keep a job more that a month. I have three kids and I know its affecting them because most of my attention goes to him and the fights they see and stuff. He is good to the kids and loves them but sometimes he is to strict with them. Another thing that scares me is that he talks about how easy it is to hurt someone and instead of saying I ll die for you or something like that he always uses Ill kill for you and just little things I notice. He has me because he always tells me that if I leave him he will take my son from me and not in the legal way so, and I also wish I could help him.

When we are home he helps me clean, cook and he takes care of the kids. He could be the most loving person in the whole world but the sometimes he turns into a nightmare. Help please; I dont know who to go to or what to do. Most of the symptoms of Bipolar seem to match him and I spoke to him about it and he is willing to go and get help. I told him and read over the info in the web together and he agrees with me but he is still having a bit trouble realizing that something could be wrong. He said that once he went to jail they told him that he had some of the symptoms but that he didnt want the meds because he thought he was ok. He has had a trouble pass including going to prison for 2 years too, his mother is alcoholic and a drug user and his father has never cared about them he even used to se him beat his mom. He tried to kill himself once when he was eleven beacuse of his father locking him in a room for two days without food but know he says he dont want to die.

I edited your post because of Forum Rule #1

1. No discussion of any illegal activity or threats of violence. (ie. illicit drug use, including medical marijuana use, threats of suicide or self-injury, or threatened or intended physical harm). Discussions of suicide or self-harm that are deemed negative and therefore potentially injurious to others are also not permitted.

Post Edited (olivia of course) : 11/17/2007 12:56:37 PM (GMT-7)


serafena
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 11/18/2007 6:23 PM (GMT -7)   
Very worried,

I'm very worried too, for you. Your boyfriend does need help. But I'm frankly more worried about you. Your boyfriend is violent and threatening. He'll make a scene in a birthing room. He'll force you to have sex when you don't want to. He threatens to take your child away. It's time for you to evaluate what you are getting out of this relationship, pack up your kids and your belongings and get your butt to a safehouse. He needs help and he'll get it, but you can't get it to him. He's proven time and again already that he has no respect for you. I'm a stranger and I can see that. Take care of those babies first. He's a grown man. He'll survive.
Serafena
Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum

It is a melancholy of mine own, compounded of many simples, extracted from many objects, and indeed the sundry contemplation of my travels, in which my often rumination wraps me in a most humorous sadness. -- William Shakespeare

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