I'm so confused which illness this little episode was - thoughts?

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wen4003
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 1193
   Posted 11/22/2007 6:09 PM (GMT -7)   
Since I went to the phsychiatrist last week and I now have a bit of a different med "cocktail", each day I have felt a little better.  This week in particular has been really good - Mon, Tues, & Weds I got more things done around the house than I have in the last 3 months and have felt really good.  Some anxiety, not a lot. 
 
Here's the problem, I got extremely angry with my son this morning.  I wasn't stressed because of the holiday or the cooking I was doing - in fact I was having some fun with it.  My daughter even wanted to help, which was cool.  But my 15 year old son has become quite selfish and everything is about him these days.  He may have been jealous this morning because his sister was helping me, I don't know and quite honestly I don't care.  I was in the middle of make a pie and reading the directions for the 5th time because of his interruptions - all about the computer (the kid's computer, not mine).  He needed help with this, needed that, etc.  I finally completely lost control and started screaming at him to get out of my face, stop bugging me, I'm trying to get stuff done, etc.  I then sent him to his room and I stormed out of the kitchen, went to my room and like a child I guess, started throwing things (not to break anything, just from frustration).  I then laid down on the bed and bawled my eyes out for half an hour or more.  I haven't had a hard cry like that in a long time, little ones here and there though.  After a bit, my husband laid down with me (I had gotten mad at him too about something stupid, but it all happened at once) and got me calmed down.  This all happened before 9:00am and then my son did something similar again later in the day.  So, it seems to be that he just isn't getting it that he needs to back off and stop being selfish and only concerned about what he wants.  And this 2nd time was after he spent some time cooking with me - so I don't think jealousy was involved.
 
I know he's 15 and that should just say it all in regards to his behavior.  But he's old enough to understand to back off when I tell him.  I give him a few warnings to back off or he's getting on my nerves, etc....so it's not like he can't understand what I'm saying.
 
I know I didn't handle this situation very well at all and I feel very guilty about that, but I can take just so much.  He was very much like this yesterday too and maybe that's why I had such a bad reaction and didn't handle it like I should have.
 
Still being so new to Bipolar and trying to figure this out, I'm not sure if this episode and my reaction was because of the Bipolar or the anxiety issues.  Does anyone here have any thoughts on this?  Any advice would be much appreciated. Thanks.
 
Wen

Agoraphobia, Barrett's Esophagus, Bipolar Disorder, Depression, Fibromyalgia, Mitral Valve Prolapse, Panic/Anxiety Disorders, Probable Narcolepsy, PTSD, Restless Leg Syndrome, Severe Acid Reflux, Sleep Apnea, Social Anxiety

Meds: Abilify, Ambien CR, Ativan, Flexeril, Lamictal, Neurontin, Nexium, Requip, Ritalin ER

 

A slip of the foot you may soon recover,

but a slip of the tongue you may never get over.

Benjamin Franklin

 


sukay
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 1432
   Posted 11/22/2007 9:43 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Wen,
 
You said, "Since I went to the phsychiatrist last week and I now have a bit of a different med "cocktail", each day I have felt a little better.  This week in particular has been really good - Mon, Tues, & Weds I got more things done around the house than I have in the last 3 months and have felt really good.  Some anxiety, not a lot." 
 
I know that feeling. You just got a med change, you start to feel real good, just like you stated above. You want to continue to enjoy the ride. This is where you have to stop and realize that something isn't right. You have to let your pdoc know what is going on. Sounds to me that you need a med adjustment. Having lots of energy really feels good when you've been down for so long. But your anxiety is starting to kick in too. Plus the irritableness. In my opinion if you continue to ride this out you'll be headed for manic episode.
 
I'm only telling you what I have learned for myself when this happens to me. I know when you finally start to feel this way, you want to ride the wave as long as you can. But you shouldn't have that much energy, plus the anxiety kickin up a bit, plus being irritable like what happened with your son. You really got upset. 
 
Sure there are triggers like how your son pushed you to the limit. But if you don't get things stabilized you may run into trouble, in my opinion. I from experience have only gotten myself in trouble when I try to ride the wave thinking that I can control it.
 
Watch yourself for the next few days. See if things continue, like the anxiety, irritableness, energy up and down, oh and if your sleep habits start to change. Ask your hubby if he has noticed any changes in you for the next couple of days too.
 
If it continues, you should call your pdoc.
 
Take Care Wen, you've come a long way.
 
 
~Sukay~
 
Crohns Disease-Remicade since 1999, Methotrexate
Fibromyalgia & Arthritis
Bipolar & Panic/Anxiety-Trileptal, Xanax, Trazadone, Wellbutrin


wen4003
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 1193
   Posted 11/23/2007 4:49 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Sukay,
 
Thank you so much for the information, this is exactly why I posted this because I'm still so new to knowing that I have Bipolar (although all my life I have never felt "right" and always felt out-of-place) that I just don'tknow what's right or wrong with all of this.  I thought having all this energy was GREAT and the way it's supposed to be because it's been a long time since that's happened.  My sleep patterns have changed - now I'm up until 1-2am and back up just before 6am and don't feel tired. 
 
Wednesday and yesterday were not good days as far as the irritableness - my kids don't have school because of the holiday (I can't wait for Monday when they go back).  My son in particular is driving me absolutely crazy, but I think part of that is because he's 15, which can be a problem all by itself.  He's just so selfish and all about him these days - he constantly interrupts whatever I may be doing and he EXPECTS me to just drop what I'm doing to tend to him.  He's 15, when I tell him to wait until I am done with what I'm doing, he should be able to do that. 
 
Here's another episode of his selfishness, Tuesday night we had to take my daughter to the ER - she has been have major sneezing fits (these sneezes are back to back, right on top of each other and have lasted for 2 hours or more), which cause her to have a hard time breathing and passing out.  I called her doc, whom we had just seen that day for this very issue, and she said to get her up to the ER, which we did.  When we got home, she still had to hold on to someone while walking because she was still a little dizzy.  I was still very worried and concerned about her and was also getting some supper together for her, as she hadn't eaten yet and it was almost 9pm.  Within 5 minutes of getting home, my son (he stayed home while we were gone), never asked how his sister was doing, but instead asked if he could go on the computer for a while.  I immediately snapped at him telling NO that it was almost 9:00 and to get his meds from his father and go to bed.
 
BTW - my daughter will be seeing an allergist w/in the next two weeks to have testing done to determine if she is allergic to anything and/or has asthma and what the treatment will be.  I'll let you know how that turns out once that appt. takes place.
 
So yes, I am more irritable but I wonder if it's because of the meds or the kids being home or a combo of both - I'm not sure.  I'm used to being home all day and it's quiet with no interruptions.  I just thought of something else too that is contributing to the irritableness - the pain from the fibromyalgia is getting worse because the cold weather is here; I don't do well in the winter because of the fibro.  I'm not really trying to rationalize anything, just trying to put all these pieces of the puzzle together.
 
The anxiety has been an ongoing thing and isn't anything new - even though I'm on Ativan 3x/day.  I'm up and down every day with the anxiety/panic - some times there's a trigger for it, other times I just wake up anxious/panicky and don't know why.  This is just an ongoing battle for me.
 
I will most definitely take your experiences and advice to heart and watch how things go for the next few days, especially after the kids are back in school.  If it continues, I will call the pdoc to let him know what's going on.  I think in the mean time though, my house may end up being the cleanest it's been for a very long time (LOL - I have to find some humor in this some how).
 
Sukay, thanks so much for responding and sharing your experiences and info with me.  Like I said, this is exactly why I posted this - because I need someone to give me an idea of why I reacted the way I did.  If I react this way at home with interruptions, how am I ever going to be able to work again where you know there will always be interruptions? 
 
Thanks again.
Luvs,
Wen

Agoraphobia, Barrett's Esophagus, Bipolar Disorder, Depression, Fibromyalgia, Mitral Valve Prolapse, Panic/Anxiety Disorders, Probable Narcolepsy, PTSD, Restless Leg Syndrome, Severe Acid Reflux, Sleep Apnea, Social Anxiety

Meds: Abilify, Ambien CR, Ativan, Flexeril, Lamictal, Neurontin, Nexium, Requip, Ritalin ER

 

A slip of the foot you may soon recover,

but a slip of the tongue you may never get over.

Benjamin Franklin

 

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