My Nikkidog died last Sunday....... (M)

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Regular Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 319
   Posted 10/16/2004 7:17 PM (GMT -6)   
When I married Tony I was always asked about his dog.  I was never a dog person so I always said she came with the husband.  That was 8 years ago.  At the time when we got together she was 7 years old. Her name was Nikki but when Jordan was born we kept telling her.. "see Nikki dog.."be nice to Nikki dog" ... and the name stuckand became Nikkidog.    She started having problems about three months ago.  She kept peeing all over my carpet.  Kidney meltdown.  She was 15 years old.    She had big brown eyes... never jumped on anyone... never barked... a perfect dog.
Last Sunday she couldnt' stand up when I went to get her.  We think she had a stroke.    I carried downstairs her downstairs and we made a place for her on the chair cushion from outside.   We covered her with blankets and put a pillow under her head.  For three hours we stayed with her.  We knew that there was nothing that we could or should do at that point.  She passed away at noon. 
While Tony was digging a grave for her Jordan and I walked outside.  She looked at the hole and looked at us and said.. "Daddy,   I dont' have a dog no more."  We told her no, that Nikkidog  had gone on to heaven.  Then she said  "Can we get a bunny?"    ...............  out of the mouths of babes.
She went to a friend's house for a play date.  Came home with a little stuffed dog.  I told her when she looked at that she could think of Nikkidog.  She then walked out of the house and back to the rear of the yard where the grave was.  I called Tony as I thought she was going to just lie the stuff dog on Nikkidog's grave. 
She didn't
She got down on her knees  and started to pray.  Oh my Lord.... I lost it at that point.  All I could do was cry.  I realized then my child knew and understood that there is a greater power in this world.  And that sometimes life is not fair.   All Tony heard when he went to pick her up was " okay God Nikkidog is in heaven now so take care of her"  " But " I would like to have her back "......
I dont' know when that dog got in my heart  but she did.  I kept looking for her the other night cause I was cutting cake for dessert and she wasn't around.  And then I tried to pet her one night  as she would always lay  by my side of the bed.    For not being a dog person I loved that NikkiDog. 

We have raced "for the Cure"
Worn Lee's Jeans on Friday "for the Cure"
Bought New Balance tennis shoes "for the cure"
Worn pink ribbon pins "for the cure"
Collected donations "for the cure"
Ate pink M&M's "for the cure"
Drank Sutter Home wine "for the cure"
Spent an extra $.08 on a stamp "for the cure"
Ate Lean Cuisine frozen dinners "for the cure"
We have all done our part "for the cure"
now you do yours and get us that cure.

Post Edited (Desertdreaming) : 10/16/2004 6:46:39 PM (GMT-6)

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 1294
   Posted 10/16/2004 7:41 PM (GMT -6)   


So sorry to hear about Nikkidog.  I am a dog person just like you.  I lost my dog Mickey seven years ago, but it is just like it was yesterday.  She the best dog ever.  We had some before and after and they are all special, but I cannot get over the feeling of loss with her.  I know I will see her again.  You and your family are in my prayers.  Just close your eyes and pet her anyway.  She is still beside you.

Love and hugs,




"A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver."  Proverbs 25:11

Regular Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 319
   Posted 10/16/2004 7:50 PM (GMT -6)   

Thank you Candy

One thing that she used to do was lie at the top of the stairs and look down.  We always called her a Cherokee dog called she had the biggest brown eyes.  Anyways... I could have sworn I saw her at the top of the stair the other night.  And Jordan was calling for her.  She told me.. " I see Nikkidog all over the place.".  My heart just  breaks.......... 

We have raced "for the Cure"
Worn Lee's Jeans on Friday "for the Cure"
Bought New Balance tennis shoes "for the cure"
Worn pink ribbon pins "for the cure"
Collected donations "for the cure"
Ate pink M&M's "for the cure"
Drank Sutter Home wine "for the cure"
Spent an extra $.08 on a stamp "for the cure"
Ate Lean Cuisine frozen dinners "for the cure"
We have all done our part "for the cure"
now you do yours and get us that cure.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 2272
   Posted 10/16/2004 8:44 PM (GMT -6)   
I am a dog person through and through. I never 'got' cats, but I am overly empathetic for dogs. My dog is my baby, he is so devoted. I have had problems with him and other people, so he is far from perfect, but he is so perfect for me.

I know how you feel, I lost a dog when I was 18, and it still feels so recent. Dogs are part of the family, no matter what anyone says.

Sorry for your loss but so happy you were enriched by Nikkidog.

Lori & Tavish

Veteran Member

Date Joined Sep 2003
Total Posts : 854
   Posted 10/16/2004 9:06 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Annette,

I'm sorry for your loss. I'm a kitty person, which I never thought I'd be. But pets are pets, and the really special ones hurt for a long time. Prayers for Nikkidog and your family.



Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 1090
   Posted 10/16/2004 9:43 PM (GMT -6)   
Oh Annette, I have had three dogs. Each and everyone has owned a piece of my heart. I have not had a dog for a year and I still almost feel her at times. I know there is nothing anyone can say to make it better. Just wanted you to know I understand so well. I am sure it brought tears to all our eyes. L&H Joyce
People are like tea bags, you have to put them in hot water to see how  strong they are!

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jan 2004
Total Posts : 693
   Posted 10/16/2004 10:56 PM (GMT -6)   

Dear Annette,

I am so sorry about Nikkidog. I am a dog and cat person. And losing them is never easy. I think that it was wonderful though that she could be at home and have you all with her and her last moments weren't in a vet's office. I know my vet once said that is rare- and it is such a blessing for the pet and the owner. I lost my two cats within 11 months of eachother. One who I had for almost 18 years I held in my arms at the vets for her final moments.

After she died her "sister" (my other cat) would jump off the couch and stand there as if she was nose to nose with her. She did this many times. Sometimes she would follow something with her eyes and I knew exactly what she was looking at. They never leave you. They really don't.

I am sure you have heard of the Rainbow Bridge. That always gives me comfort. There is also another poem that is so beautiful and so true.

I will put them here for you incase you don't know them, maybe Jordan would like them.

The Rainbow Bridge

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow

When an animal dies that has been especially
close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow
There are meadows and hills for all of our
special friends so they can run and play
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and
our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are
restored to health and vigor; those who were
hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again,
just as we remember them in our dreams of
days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for
one small thing; they each miss someone very
special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day
comes when one suddenly stops and looks into
the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His
eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run
from the group, flying over the green grass, his
legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your
special friend finally meet, you cling together in
joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The
happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands
again caress the beloved head, and you look once
more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long
gone from your life but never absent from your

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...



                        I stood by you, by your bed last night, I came to have a peep.
                        I could see that you were crying, you found it hard to sleep.
                           I whined to you softly as you brushed away a tear,
                         "It's me, I haven't left you, I'm well. I'm fine. I'm here."
                        I was close to you at breakfast. I watched you pour the tea.
                    You were thinking of the many times your hands reached down to me.
                      I was with you at the shops today. Your arms were getting sore.
                          I longed to take your parcels, I wish I could do more.
                       I was with you at my grave today. You tend it with such care.
                            I want to reassure you, that I'm not lying there.
                     I walked with you towards the house, as you fumbled for your key.
                         I gently put my paw on you, I smiled and said, "It's me."
                            You looked so very tired, and sank into a chair.
                         I tried so hard to let you know that I was standing there.
                            It's possible for me to be so near you everyday -
                            to say to you with certainty, "I never went away."
                        You sat there very quietly, then smiled, I think you knew.
                         In the stillness of that evening, I was very close to you.
                           The day is over. . . I smile and watch you yawning
                       and say, "Goodnight, God bless, I'll see you in the morning."
                        And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide,
                         I'll rush across to greet you and we'll stand side by side.
                     I have so many things to show you, there is so much for you to see.
                    Be patient, live your journey out . . . then come home to be with me.
                                        - author unknown


Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 2044
   Posted 10/17/2004 3:32 PM (GMT -6)   
Annette, I am so sorry about "Nikki dog." I know what a hole you feel in your life right now. I remember when my son's dog Babe was sick and we had to put her down. Here was this 30-something guy stroking her head with tears flowing down his cheeks. He had Babe for 14 years and she was his best friend. She is buried on grandpa's Iowa farm. Everytime Peter goes down to the farm to hunt he takes a few minutes to visit her grave. My sister has lost three beloved golden retrievers, and grieved with each one. Somehow those four-footed critters have a special place in our hearts. So, I really know what sadness you are feeling. You should be so touched that Jordan shows such spirituality. What a good job you and Tony have done raising her. Time will ease you pain, but the memories will linger forever. Sad hugs, Lauri sad
"Go confidently into the direction of your dreams. Live the life you always imagined" Thoreau
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 700
   Posted 10/17/2004 6:01 PM (GMT -6)   
Annette...I am sitting here wiping my eyes as they are leaking! I am a dog lover and have two right now. I can't imagine losing one of them. How sweet Jordon must be to go out and say a prayer. Sounds like Nikkidog had a wonderful life and is now watching over you from above. Sending hugs your way...

Sara Dearing
Today is a gift, that's why they call it the present!

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 734
   Posted 10/19/2004 8:24 PM (GMT -6)   
Annette, I can see you, Jordan, and Tony with Nikkidog. I am a true animal lover. I ordered the tape, Animals in Heaven and sent it on to my horse loving cousin. I grew up with a collie, a relation to one of the Lassies. My last dog saw me through a divorse and now my cat has been with me through cancer. I am so sorry that Nikki dog is not in sight now but I truly believe that you will see her again.
Those are beautiful poems, Jessie. I will print them. Thank you.
Love, Di
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