Please try not to be afraid. It saps the energy you need to get well. I did not have the type of cancer you have so I cannot really speak to your situation. Although, I DID have breast cancer. It may not feel like it now but you will get well. Keep researching and in the meanwhile I know someone here has been in your situation and will be able to help. Get as much information that you can so that you can ask many questions. Try to stay calm. You are in my prayers.
Pam- I know you are so scared right now that you can hardly breathe...but we are all here with you. My pathology report hit me like a ton of bricks. I thought we had 'caught it early', yet i had 5 of 49 lymph nodes positive, and for every item on there, mine had the worst outcome (vascular invasion, high degree of necrosis, etc.). AND the tumor was 4.5 CM. my oncologist was upbeat and supportive, but when i really got educated about my cancer, i realized how bad it really was. it was then that he told me (at my request) that he would put my 5-yr survival chance at 50/50. i had three kids ages 3, 5 and 6 at the time. Pam, that was 5 YEARS AGO LAST MONTH! do NOT let the numbers get you down, they do not tell the whole story. get educated, learn all you can, get a good onc that supports you, create a treatment plan, and never look back. you can do it. it's not easy, there will be hurdles to overcome, but you HAVE to believe you CAN do it. a strong attitude will carry you a very long way.... sure there will be tears, and doubts, and times of darkness, but you can pull yourself thru this. it's just a page in the book of your life. (ok, maybe a chapter).
just remember we are all here for you, and as you adjust to the diagnosis, you will feel a strength you never knew you had.